- How do your fears or hopes about humanity’s future affect your actions? What is your personal definition of “hope”?#
- The concept of hope has been a thorn in my side for some time now. I think hope is the opposite of agency. Hope is a weak emotion that arises when you have lost the ability to take meaningful action, it arises when there is nothing else you can do but hope. Fear on the other hand is a strong emotion. It is primal- keyed to our survival and can take control over our minds driving a person into rage, literally causing them to lose their mind. The opposite of fear, or perhaps contained within fear, is courage. Hope is a desperate attempt to avoid despair- the emotion that arises when a person has given up all hope and fallen into depression, despondency and or deep sadness. Fear serves to activate the fight or flight instinct, which can save our lives. But long term worries about the future give rise to long term anxieties and can eat away at our spirit.#
- Is it any wonder that so many of us turn to hope in a desperate effort to avoid the fear and anxiety that arise with knowledge of the probable future of humanity and life on Earth? This is why hope has been a thorn in my side for some time now.#
- I fear that what we have to fear is in fact radical fear. We face not just the loss of our life eventually, but probably the loss of our way of life before that. Worse yet, we face the knowledge of the loss of our culture, civilization and very possibly our species in the not-too-distant future! Is it any wonder that we choose to stay inside a warm cabin and listen to the music rather than go out on the cold deck and climb into a life raft and take the plunge into the chilly dark water?#
- From this radical fear, I choose to exercise my emotional muscle of Radical Hope. I choose to exercise my consciousness as a cultural shaman and imagination activist. I invite a new dream into our world, a dream of courage to face the coming storms. A dream that acknowledges we do not know the path to this new place, and the trail will be long and full of tears. A dream of radical hope that nevertheless; humanity will survive and flourish in love with life, in harmony with Earth, and fully awake in conversation with the Universe.#
- A Zoom Call with Jon Anderson#
- As a subscriber to Jon's Patreon page, I was delighted to receive an announcement that Jon was going to host a Zoom call titled "Ask Me Anything." A question has been burning in my mind. There was no way I was going to miss this call!#
- My Question#
- I prepared this question for Jon in advance and raised my hand when our Zoom meeting started. He looked at my pixelated face, said Hi Ken, and asked what my question was?#
- Hi Jon,#
- Like everyone on this call, I have so many words and melodies running through my consciousness thanks to you. Your presence on stage, your Songs have enriched all of us- all of these years.#
- Recently, you posted videos in protest of the terrible events in Ukraine (Song for Peace), you created a powerful protest song telling the the politicians and wall street tycoons to go and Screw themselves, and most recently you gifted us with the fun and uplifting story of Charlie and the Sun Stealers (on Patreon).#
- I believe in the power of story and music to change peoples minds and hearts as you have been doing all these years. When thinking about Global Heating, the 6th Planetary Extinction and Violence in our Societies, we desperately need new stories, dreams and visions to sustain us through the times ahead.#
- My question is… Do you have any advice for aspiring songwriters that want to take on this challenge? And have you ever considered offering an online class for songwriters?#
- Thank you for your time and energy.#
- Jon's Answer#
- What did Jon say to my questions? “Nope and Nope.” Then he proceeded to talk to me for the next 15 minutes as he went on to answer my questions. He said we are everlasting beings and we live many lives. That I needed to look into my heart and find my own way. That all I needed to do was look at the great writers of lyrics and music, like the Beatles and Paul Simon. That for him, he had been lucky. He had found a way to create spiritually based compositions that expressed the potential of human experience. That all we need to do is wake up and dream the idea of life.#
- Jon spoke to the sickness in America, that we are hung up on energy and power and money. That we have a fear of death and need to rise to the next level of consciousness. He said that America is sick. That we as a nation need to ask for forgiveness from the Native Americans (and African Americans) for what we did to them. (See Requiem For the Americas remix) That we are living with self inflicted wounds that are causing so much chaos. That we have to get rid of the guns that kill people, over and over again.#
- He then went on to speak of real people that he admired singling out Jon Stewart as brilliant, real and true. He drew attention to the recent Phish concert at Madison Square Gardens and the Waves, Whales and Dolphins that attended. He also mentioned a couple of books by the painter and mystic, Vera Stanley Alder; The Finding of the Third Eye and The Initiation of the World. He also spoke of The Seven Keys to Color Healing by Roland Hunt. Classic Jon Anderson- now I see where he gets his inspiration to paint from. (Check out Sound and Color from the South American tour and band, off the Native American concept album Toltec.)#
- On Recently Departed Friends#
- After that, Jon took other questions and spoke quite a bit about the loss of two of his best musical friends, Alan White and Vangelis. He said Alan was the best man at his wedding, and one the best people he ever knew. He never had a bad word to say about anything. Jon was amazed at how Alan was able to step into the band when Bill Bruford suddenly left. Jon reminded us that Alan cowrote the beautiful Turn of the Century with him and he suggested going back to look at some of the video of Alan on the epic Gates of Delerium - he was a monster drummer! Jon said Alan loved his mom dearly and the last year had been very hard on him. He was looking forward to seeing his mom in heaven again.#
- Of Vangelis, Jon had a lot to say. That he was the best musician Jon ever knew. He loved watching him at his keyboard with his big fat Greek fingers… his music was romantic, powerful, surreal and cosmic! All in one larger than life person. Jon said that Vangelis also carried around with him a cloud in his pocket. He would often pull the cloud out and put it over his head where it would rain down on him. Jon said he also had terrible stage fright, and twice when Jon was in the audience asked him to come up on stage and perform together. They made wonderful music together.#
- Closing#
- There were lots of references to songs from the past. Jon would sing a few words and everyone would guess the song. He spoke of his current concert tours with the young peeps from the Paul Green Rock Academy and music he was working on to be released within days. Jon also soke of the recent Phish concert at Madison Square Gardens with flying whales and dolphins!#
- As always, Jon remains an amazing creative force- an everlasting being full of life and love. A great Sage of Music and the Angel of Rock and Roll. It was a Beautiful, Wonderful, Extraordinary, Amazing Beautiful Experience. Bless his Soul!#
- I perceive a time when grandpa would get down on the floor and tickle me until I cried, then I begged for more. A time when my good friend Dave looked me in the eyes, then gave up his life to the water devil. A time when Mt. St. Helens blew her top, and my future wife melted into my arms. A time when my daughters became women and brought forth daughters of their own. A time when I grew old and melted back into Earth and the Moon, and the Sun and the Stars.#
- All of this is within my consciousness, and the time is now.#
- We are frequently admonished to live in the present- in the now. But honestly, I find this difficult to do. Yes, I can live in the now when I am in the flow; but more often than not, the now contains memories of the past; and anxieties and hopes about the future. Einstein taught us about Relativity, and Star Trek taught us about the Space/Time Continuum. But I think the story of our embodied minds teaches us what it means to be human.#
- From the eastern sciences of consciousness, we have learned how to meditate. How to observe our minds and the thoughts that arise spontaneously. How to quiet our minds, if only for a little bit of time. In the western tradition, we have used the scientific method and technologies like magnetic resonance imaging to look into how our minds operate biologically. We are beginning to understand our embodied minds as vast neural networks that are structurally coupled to our Earthly environments, each with a unique history. Consciousness appears to emerge in a flow of fractal neural patterns; sensations cohere into feelings, which can become moods forming states of mind. Human language allows thoughts to emerge that can cohere into ideas, flowing into attitudes and worldviews about life.#
- This is a huge simplification, an abstraction. And that is what we humans are capable of doing with our embodied minds. We have evolved to tell stories, to abstract our experience of the real world- precisely because the story tellers before us survived and reproduced to tell there stories to us. And I think that at its most fundamental level, it is a story about time. About human time. It is a story about life- because Life eats Life. Like our stories, we have a beginning, a middle and an end. We are connected to all of life- reaching deep into the past, and perhaps deep into the future. Our consciousness arises embodied in our body, with a beginning, a middle, and sadly, an end. I believe our Consciousness ends with the end of our body.#
- I perceive a time when the way of life of indigenous people came to an end and they were forced onto reservations. A time when the sun set on the British Empire. A time when the Roman Empire fell. A time when the civilization on Easter Island collapsed. A time when Western Civilization collapsed. A time when the Human Race overshot the carrying capacity of Earth. A time when we tipped the climate into a runaway greenhouse causing extinction of human beings and most of complex life.#
- All of this is within my consciousness, and the time is now.#
- Which is why sometimes I wish I could just simply live in the here in now, but that seem to be an idealized goal that only a few sages on mountain tops manage to achieve. We ordinary humans bring forth into our consciousness concepts of time as a means to survive, reproduce, and tell our story. We are able to learn from those that came before us from past time, and project our understanding to those that will follow us in future time. And we can act in the here and now to change the course of events that will flow into a possible future.#
- I think these thought because I am driven by instinct to do so. I want my children, and all children down the line to live a good life as I have. With their heartbeats beating to the rhythm of their feet, with blood coursing through their veins as they make love and create new stories for their children. I want them to have all the time in the world.#
- I perceive a time when we look out upon the storm gathering on the horizon and collectively decide to change our minds. A time when we realize Earth is our only home and we better take care of her. A time when we understand we may be alone in the Universe, the first species born to a planet that can language with each other. A time when we learn to fit our needs into the needs of the rest of life, and become a regenerative life force. A time when our species as a whole enters into deep geological time, in conversation with this beautiful planet we call Earth.#
- All of this is within my consciousness, and the time is now.#
- The Deep Purpose of Life#
- Flyfishing for Steelhead and playing Tai Chi have a lot in common. They look silly from outside, but feel great inside. Both require you to step into the great rivers of life and wade in their flow. They take time and practice, but they give you time and patience; to ask questions of yourself. Questions like, what am I? What is the deep purpose of life? What is the Tao in my own nature?#
- How do you relate to the Gaia hypothesis? Do you perceive the Earth as a living being? How does this affect your own relationship with the rest of life on Earth?#
- I see GAIA as a living being in feminine form. I think of her as having birthed all of life, but that is too simple and does not capture her Tao. It is important to see her as both created by life on earth, and the creator and sustainer of life on earth, both yin and yang. She reaches all the way down into the magnetic core, includes all life in the biosphere, hydrosphere and atmosphere; and reaches all the way to the Sun and beyond. Maybe GAIA is best thought of as Great Grandmother?#
- Where do you see the forces of entropy and/or negentropy playing out in our day-to-day lives (socially, environmentally, personally)?#
- The Taoist masters of ancient times were funny creatures. But modern Physicist have outdone them with silly terms like Entropy and Negentropy! Why not just call them Yin and Yang?#
- Entropy is Yang, energy dissipating, increasing disorder. We see entropy everywhere. Societies are breaking down as so-called social networking addicts humans to dopamine hits and destroys social cohesion with anger. The rich diversity and complexity of natural ecosystems are simplified into monocrops polluted by chemical inputs. Fossil fuels safely sequestered underground, are dug up and burned dissipating energy and heating Earth. The life force in all of us and our creations, declines continually, requiring energy and maintenance til the end.#
- Negentropy is Yin, energy concentrating, increasing order. I prefer to view Negentropy as Einstein framed it- CosmoGenesis: the creation of the cosmos and life within it. Civilization has created great works of art, architecture, music; and has literally probed the universe to make meaningful order of it within our minds. We are witness to new ways of relating to the environment with sustainable design, a return to organic farming, and beginning to recognize the “legal rights” of other species, and even places as entities. Western science has embraced eastern science and now recognizes the life force within us all is real- creating new tools and methods to heal illnesses in whole beings, and extend life. #
- If humanity were to be invited to join “The United Federation of Planets,” what would we have to do to make ourselves ready?#
- The story of one person illustrates what is required of all of us- together. Hellen Keller suffered an unknown disease at the very young age of 19 months that left her blind and deaf. Thanks to a gifted teacher, she experienced a miraculous transformation in her mind. One magical day she suddenly began to “language” with her teacher in a flash of inspiration that opened up the entire universe to her, with one simple word spelled out in braille on her hand, ‘water.’#
- In order to join the United Federation of Planets, the human race must likewise transform itself, and join into “languaging” with Earth, GAIA, or better yet, Great Grandmother. And to me, ‘water’ seems like good a place to start.#
- The Tao in my Own Nature#
- I met a man on the river one day. After talking for awhile he said he knew me, he said I was a “Russian pessimist.” I asked him what a Russian pessimist was? He said a Russian pessimist is someone who believes things can get worse than they already are. He knew me alright. But no more.#
- Consider a current cultural attractor (e.g. consumerism, the #MeToo movement or Black Lives Matter), and how you relate to it. Can you identify elements of it that are more general, and those that are more specific to your own unique experience?#
- It has been all too easy for me to be a pessimist. The cultural attractors that drew my attention were big ideas like environmentalism, collapse theory, planetary extinction, and the loss of everything specific that I loved in the natural world; beautiful, wonderful extraordinary, amazing beautiful living creatures and landscapes. As an outdoorsman, I have indigenous experience with the destruction of our fellow creatures. As an architect, I have professional experience with the destruction of our natural landscapes.#
- Which phase in the Adaptive Cycle Model do you think our civilization is in right now?#
- The Adaptive Cycle Model is a powerful idea (cultural attractor) to think with about our civilization, and ourselves. Like an ‘egregore,’ is it associated with a shape, an infinity symbol with similarities to the yin-yang circle. The idea/symbol has the power to help us understand transformations in human and natural systems. The model is well understood from a western scientific perspective, and worthy of meditation from an eastern spiritual perspective.#
- Taken as a whole, our civilization is clearly well within the conversation phase, on the cusp of a radical release into a transformative reorganization. Like yin and yang, there is much to be excited about, and much to fear. Such is the Tao.#
- What is an attractor of consciousness that you can identify in yourself? How might you want to reshape this attractor through intention? #
- Pessimism and fear have been defining characteristics in my worldview. But no longer. I choose to consciously rearchitect the neural connectivity of my mind/body. I choose to embrace “water” as Helen Keller did; and keep waking up- over and over again- to the flow I am embedded in; until I return to the Tao. My intention is to deepen my practice of Tai Chi (and teach my grandchildren how to fish). My intention is to use “consciousness to refine consciousness” as the internal martial arts of Taoism teach- a whole mind/body reshaping of a whole mind/body. In this way, I can harmonize with others, and together we have the potential achieve the transformation of humanity and be invited to join the United Federation of Planets.#
- Yours truly, Ken Hall ( No longer a Russian Pessimist :)#
- How the Tao of Systems Thinking informs the interbeing, and ethical questions about the places we live...#
- Designers Whitney-Hall#
- We are a yin-yang design team. Mary Ann and I are grateful we had the skill and opportunity to design our own home together- over three decades ago. We applied the conceptual knowledge we learned as architects, and our animate intuitions and shared values. We have learned much from our home since then. This is what it says to us today...#
- Tao Generates One#
- "I emerged from the great void, brought into the universe in a natural unfolding process of design and construction. The land on which I live is a south facing slope, perfect to tuck into the hill and keep warm while peeking out at the sun in the winter. The sloping street next to me rose to a mound and then descended to a rain swale across the width of me. That, together with lack of financial resources imparted a frugal nature to my existence that limited what I could become. Constraints are a source of creativity from which I benefitted. Constraints generate solutions."#
- One Generates Two#
- "Yang energies forced me into straight lines for simple construction and less wasted materials. Bulldozers prepared my earth pad with a balanced cut-and-fill to save energy and earth material. Industrial civilization provided hookups for my sewage wastage off-site. Electrical inputs are from local hydraulic dams which lower my carbon footprint. Not all of my materials are harmless, but the insulation tempers heat loss and gain, and in general I am small, using less of everything. Small is beautiful."#
- "Yin energies provide me with living qualities. I mimic the conifer tree’s to shed rain water, and long overhangs shade my trunk in the summer but allow the winter sun deep into my interior. My boundary expands south into the yard in the summer when it is warm, and collapses inward in the winter when it is cold. Parts of me peek through the roof envelope so that I have eyes onto the world around me. I am comprised of four living centers that descend down the hill on which I stand, all of them with eyes to the south. The simple sloping roof changes height over the four descending living enabling a unique life energy to emerge at each. Simple is beautiful."#
- Tao Generates Three...#
- "I am oriented to the Sun, and know my place in the Universe. Yin and Yang energies flow though me harmoniously. As I live, I change over time. More efficient appliances reduce the materials crossing my boundaries. Better interior materials improve my indoor air quality. I am sad that I lost three of my Tree People friends on the south side in a winter freeze on my last trip around the sun, but my People have planned to change my eyebrows so that the warming sun is not so bright in the summers to come. I helped raise two young girls into fine young women that now have families and homes of their own. I am watching my People grow old as I too am engaged in my own natural processes or order and disorder. It is good to be alive."#
- ...and Three Generate All Things#
- "My good life is the result of a natural unfolding in creation, from stillness to movement- “Wu-wei” comes to my mind. My living qualities are the result of living patterns that bring life to materials and processes- “Li” is the Taoist term for the patterns that unify and structure our world. I am an expression of the underlying principle of unity and mutual interbeing of the 10,000 things, events and processes. I am Tao of Home."#
- A boy was born the year the Dalles Dam swallowed Celilo Falls on the Columbia. For 10,000 years the People had gathered there every spring; they came from thousands of miles north and south, trading furs, beads and other things for dried salmon. But no more. The falls had fed the People for 10,000 years, but it only took one day for the Dam to swallow the falls.#
- Later, a little man went with his father high up the Wind River. It was Spring. They crawled on their bellies the last few feet and peeked over the edge into a canyon where the Sun did not go. Mighty Salmon People swam below. The Spring Chinook had returned to the gravel homes of their birth and they danced together in the pool of cold clear water. The buck turned sideways, flashing his sides, digging a new home and laying his seed in the gravel. The hen followed gently laying her eggs, and the buck covered them up with his powerful tail. Below them in the soft shallow waters of the tail out, the Salmon People that were finished digging homes for their little ones, were beginning to rot even as their tails still stroked the water they loved. The little man was hooked for life.#
- Later, a young man went with his grandfather to the John Day Dam. It was Summer. Grandfather worked the dam and taught the boy how to hook Salmon People on the rip rap below the dam. They sat in the counting station, watching the mighty ones on their long migration upriver, listening to the clicker as each one was counted, a measure of their slow death over time. At first, the Dams were simply concrete barriers. Realizing their mistake, the planners drew up plans and there was more work to be done building the Fish Ladders. Still, grandfather knew his work killed the very thing he loved. Fish ladders would only slow the slow death. But he needed the work in order to live.#
- Later, a man- now a father himself- walked the Wilson River with fly rod in hand. It was Fall. He was hunting Steelhead People. They followed the Salmon People, and ate any eggs that were loosed from their gravel homes. He knew how to trick the Steelheads with a hook that looked like a Salmon egg. The water had been high and now it was low. The banks were full of rotting Salmon People. Thousands of them. It reeked of rotting flesh. Otherwise washed barren by the floods, the river was thankful for the rotting Salmon People. They were food for the trees that would grow and protect the banks from the floods, and protect the insects that would grow in their shade and feed the little Salmon People next spring.#
- Much later, an old man walked into the grocery store with his Granddaughter. It was Winter. The lights were powered by the dam. The refrigerator where the Salmon People were kept on ice was powered by the dam. He looked at the fish that were raised in a pen, caged in the Ocean. They no longer fed the river, they no longer roamed wild in the Ocean. They were now part of the machine. He looked at the other fish, the ones with a Symbol that told their story- how they were raised in a sustainable fishery way up north, in Alaska. He looked at the price, frowned, and traded paper for the fish with the Sustainable Symbol. Although less of them fed the rivers, at least they still roamed free in the Ocean. It was better than the alternative.#
- A tear filled his eye. Granddaughter asked what was wrong? The Salmon People are leaving us, he said. We will eat this one, and celebrate its life. We will deny the greedy ones that raise the Salmon People in pens. We will celebrate the People that sustain the fishery up North. We will use our paper to change the Circle of Life for the better. #
- Granddaughter asked, why do we eat them? Because we love them and they are part of us, he said. What will we do if all the Salmon People leave us, she asked? We will follow them, he said.#
- Unfolding by Design#
- I have long been a fan of Christopher Alexander who has influenced my design processes in the field of architecture. He also influenced computer science which repurposed his thinking in The Pattern Language into programming concepts. Christopher Alexander proposed that good designs can be measured by the degree of life they contain and he defined this concept and how to measure it. And like nature, that we can create designs that are full of life if we allow them to unfold naturally. He passed away recently, but his thinking is fully developed in his most recent set of four books on The Nature of Order. I propose that outlines structure word chunks in a way that allow us to unfold better writing, maybe even helping to achieve writing that is "full of life?"#
- Process Outlines#
- In the past, I have used a structured methodology by Peter Ingle using outlining to write longer technical articles. The goal, it to spend more time planning what you write, and less time re-writing. It has worked well for me, except I usually jump into word crafting too early, especially for shorter pieces. But on my most recent story, I committed myself to the discipline of unfolding a story in a set of sequential steps. When I did finally jump from outline to prose in my "first" draft if flowed nicely and quickly. I slept on it one night, reread it, and marked it up with surprisingly little red ink. After sleeping on it one more night, I woke and quickly edited it into its final form.#
- Parallel Outlines#
- An important learning lesson was not allowing the outline to evolve and transform into the finished product. Rather, I redid each outline anew as the purpose of the outline changed with each sequential step. This allowed me to expand parallel outline chunks to review previous stages and keep the writing focused and on the task at hand during that stage of the process of unfolding. It also has the benefit of preserving previous ideas that I could return to if/when needed.#
- Outlining for "Life"#
- I wonder if shorter pieces can transform and jump to prose more quickly? It seems to me that Dave has developed great skill at quickly unfolding prose using outlines. I on the other hand have a tendency towards complexity, and benefit from the discipline of outline planning, even on shorter pieces. Longer piece definitely benefit from discipline in planning, and most likely from the process of parallel development. At least that is true for me. On my most recent effort below, I made it 90% of the way before jumping to prose. Still too early. Next time I am going for 95% of the way! I will leave it to you to judge is Starlifter Down has a the quality of “life" within it?#
- Friday, March 21st, 1975#
- Word spreads like fire on an Air Force Base. Doubly true if your father is a flyer. Even faster during war. We knew. I was the oldest, born at Mountain Home A.F.B. Idaho, where dad was flying tankers to refuel bombers and fighter craft in the air. Kevin, was the youngest, born at Kindley A.F.B. Bermuda, where dad was flying rescue missions to recover Gemini astronauts and their space craft. Following the space mission, he was transferred to McChord A.F.B. Washington to learn and fly the C-141 Starlifter to support the war effort in Vietnam. It would become the last base we served on.#
- Kevin recently asked me what I remember about that day. Friday, March 21st, 1975. #
- We were in our tenth year at McChord, a long tour of duty by military standards. My father, Charles F. Hall, had achieved the highest rank an enlisted man can. He was Chief Master Sergeant and the Lead Flight Instructor for the 8th. Military Airlift Command Squadron, responsible for the safety of every crew man in the squadron.#
- By this time, Charlie, as he was called by friend and crew, had over 10,000 hours flying the C-141 Starlifter into airfields in Vietnam. Twice a month he made the long trip from home to the battle zone. The “C” designation means Cargo, and Charlie carried the weapons of war into Vietnam; ammunition and agent orange, helicopters and men. And every trip he brought home the results of war, coffins with boys in them. Boys just barely older than me. #
- I was proud of my dad, as any boy would be. He stayed up late most nights at home, studying his manuals. As a flight engineer, he was responsible for the power plant- four Pratt and Whitney jet engines. As he put it, it was his job to get the plane up in the air and keep it there. The only thing the pilots did was point it in a direction! Dad had lots of stories, and we loved hearing them all. We had our own stories too. Growing up, it was not uncommon to have friends just disappear from school- because their fathers did not return home from a trip. I still remember a prior day in Bermuda, when an Air Force and Navy plane collided while dropping frogmen into the water on a practice run. The sharks were in the water, and kids disappeared from school the next day. #
- On that day, Friday, March 21st, 1975, we were expecting him home from Vietnam. I was in my Senior year at High School in my first class of the day. Word spread like wildfire visibly disrupting the entire school of over 1500 students- a Starlifter was down, somewhere in the Olympic Peninsula. Not far from home, the Olympics are like a huge fortress of mountains that stand guard over the Puget Sound, sheltering it from the violent storm of the Pacific Ocean. The Olympics are the last hurdle to clear in the long haul from Vietnam to McChord Air Force Base. On that day- a Starlifter was down, in the Olympics.#
- Mom#
- I heard the word and rushed for the phone to call home. Already kids were lined up to call home. When it was my turn, I dialed my dear sweet mom and will never forget that call. She picked up. “Mom?” “Kenny?” Her breathing was shallow and fast, deep panic in every breath. She feared I was the base commander calling to give her the most terrible news possible. But no, there was no official word yet, and she was enduring the worst fear possible not knowing.#
- Feeling the pain of my mother, I stuck another quarter in the phone and dialed the operator. Connect me to the Base Commander I instructed. No please in my voice, no hint of a request, just a military order on the phone. No one on a military base wants to talk to the base commander. And for someone my age, especially me- it usually means you are in big trouble. But the old man picked up the phone. He was calming. Yes, my father was listed on the manifest for that flight, but no, they did not have final word and were waiting for more details. He would call my mother as soon as he knew more. I hung up and ran to my car.#
- Between school and home was a lake with a bridge across it. The nice houses along the lake were hidden from view by hedges that grew into a narrow lane with lots of blind curves leading up to the bridge. It was my Le Mans, and the gearbox on my Volkswagon screamed as I hit second gear on my favorite curve, drifting across the line to straighten out the road. Emerging from the lakeside trees, I crossed that bridge like a bullet fired from a gun. #
- Less than 15 minutes after leaving school, I was home- and mom had just hung up the phone with the base commander. He had called to personally give her the news after confirmation. Although listed on the flight manifest, my dad had been pulled off the flight in Yakota, Japan, where they stopped for refueling. It turns out, the Starlifter had suffered a sudden depressurization event in flight out of Vietnam, probably from gunfire- and unknown to my dad, flawed dental work had left an air pocket in a tooth which erupted in violent pain during the depressurization event. Another crewman had replaced Charlie on that flight home.#
- Duty#
- No sooner had dad returned on the very next flight- but he turned around and left. As the flight instructor, it was now his job to join the Search and Rescue crew to look for survivors, inspect the crash site and file the accident report. It was a grim task. He knew every crewman on that flight- they were close friends. And it was a tough task. From the flight path they knew about where the plane must be, on Mt. Constance- the third highest peak in the Olympic Mountain range- and possibly the toughest.#
- Mt. Constance is on the Eastern side of the range, the last peak to get across when descending into McChord airfield from the Pacific. It rises from the Hood Canal at sea level up to 7,743 feet. Easy to spot from Seattle, it is the highest visible jagged peak. A rain forest enshrouds the base, rock and glacier are exposed at the peak. It is a tough climb on a good day, but a miserable climb when you are looking for your friends at a crash site.#
- My dad told me what they found up there, and I will not repeat the details out of respect. It is enough to know that the crew of 10 airmen and six passengers that were “jumping” home all died instantly. They never knew what hit them. They flew straight into the top of Mt. Constance at 600 miles per hour while in descent. It was early morning, still in the dark. They had a moment of surprise and confusion when the crash alarm went off, and then nothing. They hit the rocky ridge a mere 150 feet below the top. If they had begun their descent into McChord air field 30 seconds later, they would have missed the mountain and had a story to tell.#
- Sixteen souls were lifted into the deep blue yonder that day- and flags were lowered to half mast on base. We soon learned the events leading up to the crash were all avoidable- as is almost always the case. An Air Traffic Controller operating out of the Seattle Tacoma international airport had mistaken the C-141 Starlifter for a different plane, a Navy Grumman A-6 Intruder, and authorized the descent below 10,000 feet. My dads assessment however was that it was the crews fault. They knew better and were instructed to double check before beginning descent over the Olympic Mountain range. Charlie had flown that descent a couple hundred times. He speculated what they were doing. They were tired from too many hours of flying. They were likely disobeying orders and filling out their paperwork in flight- because when they landed, they wanted to go straight home and crawl into their own beds. Close to home, they felt safe- and their minds were tricked into complacency.#
- Honor#
- Years later, my mom shared with me how depressed my father was becoming those last few years flying in and out of Vietnam. He was sick and tired of bringing home caskets with boys in them. In those days, every casket was draped in a flag and reported by the media. And I was getting to the age where I could have been drafted myself.#
- That is most likely why dad invited me to attend the military funeral with him honoring the dead at the McChord Theatre. The week before, I had watched a Saturday matinee, and now I was among men dressed in full military uniform, medals of honor pinned to their chest, and Taps being played by a military dress band. It was a deeply moving ceremony that gave meaning to the lives of those men. It made my heart swell with sadness, and the pride of patriotism that gives strength to men risking their lives. After the soulful prayers and stirring music were concluded, we adjourned outside for a volley of rifle fire for each man, and fighter jets flew overhead in “missing man” formation.#
- We learned later that the Air Traffic Controller blamed himself for the accident and took his own life- so now their were seventeen souls that died when that Starlifter went down. And that was another tragic mistake. Who is to say the accident was his fault? I wish now I had asked my dad when I could. Maybe it was the fault of the dentist? Maybe had his work not been shoddy, my father would have been on that plane. Maybe he would have prevented the accident. He had done so before. And maybe he too would have been filling out paperwork. Maybe.#
- Survival#
- What I have learned since then, is that it is not enough to be prepared. And it is not enough to be lucky. You have to also carry foremost in your mind -all the time- that you are human, and subject to a set of traps that evolution has bred into our biology. Those men flying that Starlifter were tired, and they had their sights set on home. Having your sights set on safety can literally blind you. And that is just one of the many traps of biology we now understand much better.#
- If you, or someone you know engages in any kind of risky behavior like rock climbing, or whitewater rafting, or just driving a car down the freeway late at night- I strongly suggest reading Deep Survival: Who Live, Who Dies, and Why? Written by Lawrence Gonzales, it begins with a story of his father surviving a downed flight in WWII, and tells many other stories in the context of what we are learning about ourselves as biological beings revealed by new discoveries in cognitive science. It is required reading for the friends that join me in our outdoor adventures, so that we keep a good eye on each other! #
- Another lesson learned for those who survive an accident, or anyone looking back on a set of circumstances and wondering how and why they worked out the way they did, don’t! Never look back, never second guess yourself. Do not judge yourself or others! This world is too complex for human beings to disentangle with our minds. When you are tempted to do so, remember this Chinese parable as told by the late Zen teacher, Alan Watts- and stop that thought before it even gets started!#
- Once upon a time there was a Chinese farmer whose horse ran away. That evening, all his neighbors came around to commiserate. They said, “We are so sorry to hear your horse has run away. This is most unfortunate.” The farmer said, “Maybe.” The next day the horse came back bringing seven wild horses with it, and in the evening everybody came back and said, “Oh, isn’t that lucky. What a great turn of events. You now have eight horses!” The farmer again said, “Maybe.”#
- The following day his son tried to break one of the horses, and while riding it, he was thrown and broke his leg. The neighbors then said, “Oh dear, that’s too bad,” and the farmer responded, “Maybe.” The next day the conscription officers came around to conscript people into the army, and they rejected his son because he had a broken leg. Again all the neighbors came around and said, “Isn’t that great!” Again, he said, “Maybe”#
- Having taken the time to compose and post a longer piece using Drummer (my first) about People of Canyon De Chelly (immediately below) I record here a few Lessons Learned:#
- It took a little restructuring of the outline to get the feel of a coherent piece with HTML tags to achieve bold headers. Now I know.#
- I erred in my assumptions about how the "#" links work, thinking I could link to specific subsections. Rather they position position the particular outline item (a paragraph in this case) at the top of the page, but the full article (one day) is fully rendered. (Example.)#
- It was easiest to include images as "inlineImage" header attributes for an outline item with a caption. This worked very well. Previously, I have had to put in quite a bit of time attempting to compose images within the flow of text using HTML tags. This can be a little tedious. (Example.)#
- Also, Ken Smith's posting about longer articles reminded me of a structured writing method i used to use that worked very well for longer technical articles. I plan to redeploy this method on my next effort, likely using both an OPML file written to disk (and a Pages document) before including it in a daily post.#
- I am using Pages for longer pieces because I benefit from getting away from the piece for a few days, printing it out, scratching it up with a pen- and then massivly redoing it as my thinking/emotions evolve. I find it to be very different than a shorter post. #
- My coding experience is very limited, but I may yet need to dig into scripting as i would like to know how to gather up various sections of outlines and string them together into an even longer post. Maybe this is naive. Any suggestions/tips about what I am missing are welcome.#
- HTH. It is challenging to write clearly about the particulars of using software. Cheers.#
- In Search of Shadow and Spirit#
- We are a modern day shadow catcher and wagon master. Mary Ann with her digital camera and lenses, and I with our 400 horse F-150 and 19’ trailer. Together, we have been thankful for the opportunity to travel the west and experience her landscapes and people. On this particular adventure we had a mission, to return to Canyon de Chelly and hire a native Dineh guide- referred to by our culture as Navajo- to take us into that beautiful enchanted canyon that has been home to so many different native people. And we had a few delightful surprises along the way.#
- Driving is good for the soul- it gives you time to think deeply and bring to the surface what the modern world tends to cover up. On this drive I was thinking about our relationship with each other, as people- person-to-person. We are social creatures, evolved to live in community, and our brains are wired to help us, although in todays world that wiring can also hurt us. Our relationship with the First Peoples is, well, conflicted to say the least. Tangled up in that messy ball are the mythic portrayals of the American West, ideas about what is savage and noble, conflicting versions of nature and god, and of course ownership of land and access to natural resources. #
- Thinking on these things, I listened to the emotions stirring in my body. I could feel a sense of embarrassment and shame for the pain of so many conquerers over the ages. A degree of grief and sadness in the loss of loved ones in fights to defend ways of living and land. Some remorse and empathy as I considered how wealth is accrued, or not- depending on where you are born, and to whom. But as I was beginning to dwell on equanimity, my attention was snapped to full alert as we climbed a hill and the snowflakes began to fall.#
- I feared the remaining one hour drive to the canyon would become a full day ordeal. As we neared the pass, the snow became a howling blizzard with wipers struggling to keep the windows clear. This is not good when towing a trailer and I kept it slow. But as we descended into the final valley and searched for our campground, the snow diminished and the clouds began to part revealing the beauty of bare cottonwood trees enshrouded in snow with the rays of a setting sun alight on their frozen limbs. We had arrived, and we were excited.#
- Canyon De Chelly and Canyon Del Muerto#
- We awoke early to a bluebird day full of promise. Freezing cold and crystal clear. the soft glow of the sun was just peaking over the hills. Only one other camper braved the elements to join us at Cottonwood Campground right next to the canyon. Perfect.#
- The first westerners to come upon the canyon and it inhabitants were the Spanish. Later when Americans tried to read the written Spanish name, Canyon De “Tseyi” became De “Chelly,”pronounced today as Canyon De “Shay.” Like branches of a tree, there are actually two main canyons, the second being Canyon Del Muerto- which means dead in Spanish (and indeed many Spanish were killed there at Massacre Cave when they climbed the cliff walls to attack the inhabitants.)#
- There is no hint of the canyons from a distance. They are like a crack in the earth you come upon suddenly and peer over the edge. Deep time and geological forces formed this landscape; crashing tectonic plates deep underground lifted the land, while torrential rain fall carried away the softer earth materials to expose red cliffs worn smooth by wind and textured by the swirl of vortices. Topophilia is a strange word that comes to mind, it means love of landscape. This is a place that is easy to love. It takes your breath away when you gaze upon it and marvel at creation, the ever-changing patterns of beauty tickle your minds eye. #
- The place where the two canyons join together into the mainstream of Canyon De Chelly is logically named Junction, and that is where we experienced our first magical surprise of the day. Junction is a fairly smooth rocky plateau overlooking the canyon, and the ages have weathered small shallow bowls in the landscape which were filled with frozen water. Perfect for photography in this weather, and Mary Ann was off to capture reflections of canyon walls and clouds floating in the deep blue sky. And then it happened…#
- Dineh Spirits Embrace Us#
- Alone, not a tourist about, all of a sudden Mary Ann was surrounded by curious, suspicious dogs. Half a dozen at least, and she shot me that look that says “get over here now!” I delayed just long enough to secure Priya in the truck and began rushing across the frozen rocky plateau when we both saw a herd of sheep emerge from the brush, followed by their Dineh shepherd. He indicated they were good dogs and we both relaxed. Mary Ann set about capturing the moment with sheep, dogs and frozen pools of water. And I walked over to the shepherd.#
- Here was an old man, moving slowly. His face weathered dark, cracked and red, just like the canyon. As I approached we both smiled and I saw he had but few teeth. And as he smiled he pulled out a rock from his pocket and asked if I wanted to buy it? He told me he had painted it and it was the only one he had on him. How much, $20. Sure I said and dug through my wallet. He turned the rock over and showed me his signature, Clarence Dawes.#
- We spoke for awhile and I heard his story. The sheep were there for the water, busting through the iced pools to get a drink wherever possible. This is dry country and the locals know how to take advantage of every bit of water. Clarence told me his grandfather was a soldier in WWII. Not a code talker, but a fighter. I asked if he was Dineh, and he told me he was Blackfeet and Dineh. I know the Blackfeet were fierce warriors and he smiled when I told him so. He had married into the Dawes family and taken the name of his Dineh wife, as is the way with matriarchal cultures. We spoke slowly, sharing a little time together- but the sheep were moving on, so after posing for a photograph, Clarence and I shook hands and said good bye. The last I saw of him, he was getting out of the wind behind a brush, lighting a smoke.#
- We were excited to have had such a unique opportunity- snow and ice, rock and canyon, Dineh sheep and shepherd, all under a blue sky. So we resumed our adventure, heading off to the next spot along the rim overlooking the canyon. Here we found our first couple of tourist, who were ignoring the van was backed in with its rear door open. I could see a Dineh rug hangin out the back, and a young energetic Dineh man emerged and soon engaged Mary Ann in conversation. Again she shot me that look, this one signaling I needed to extract her from this tourist trap! Naturally, I went over to join in the conversation and realized immediately I was dealing with a talented charismatic salesman! He had three painting to show us in the back of the van as he proceeded to draw us into his story.#
- Growing up a shy young Dineh hiding behind his mother, he told us how he had come out of his shell by relearning the ancient ways from his elders and how to interpret the meaning of their art. He explained the symbols on his painting and told us we could find him on Google and Youtube where he tells his story and explains the symbols in more detail. Of course I was going to buy a painting from him- he was a hoot and we hit it off. Out came my wallet again, but I was running low on cash, and asked Mary Ann what she had? I explained I had spent a little money up the road with a Shepherd at Junction and he asked if it was Clarence. Yes it was, and he told me Clarence was his grandfather! Canyon De Chelly was a big place he said, but everyone in it is connected. When he offered to pose for the photograph, I retrieved Clarence’s rock from the truck for him to hold with his own painting. He made sure we knew how to spell his name so we could look him up on the internet, then we said shook hands goodbye. Antonio Carroll - with two R’s and two L’s.#
- Now we had met grandfather and grandson and were happy to talk with them. Mary Ann had captured their shadows, and I have their paintings in my studio. I reflected on my own Grandfather, Leo “Clarence” Beckwith. Leo was a country man. Of the many gifts he gave me, one was knowing how to meet people- anyone, and talk with them out of respect, and how to shake their hand.#
- Shadows Cast Light in the Dark#
- Another bluebird morning followed with air fresh and crisp. Our breath was visible as we walked to our meeting spot with our native guide. Awaiting us were a classic red 4WD jeep and Benjamin Anagal of Beauty Way Tours. He was about my age, but much larger and looked older, his face was round, with a large nose and gentle eyes. I noticed he had no ear lobes, rather a large fold of skin that stretched from his ear half way down his neck- all of it beaten by years in wind and sun. Benjamin filled the Jeep- his large belly pressing against the round steering wheel held him firmly in place as we bounced down the tire rutted stream bed. I liked Benjamin from the first moment we spoke on the phone, and grew to like him even more during the several hours we spent together as he guided us through the riverbed of Canyon de Chelly.#
- Benjamin grew up in the canyon, his family has property at Junction, where Canyon de Merde meets Canyon de Chelly (at the same place we had met Antonio up above on the rim the day before.) His Aunt lives there now- the only person that lives in the canyon year around- not just battling the winter, but also protecting her sheep from Mountain Lions and Black Bear. Benjamin showed us where he grew up, beneath ancient ruins of the Anasazi people, the settlements where they lived and left their marks. He described how his family moved around, shifting their livestock from the mountains in the fall and back into the canyon in the spring. His first language was Dineh, and we learned he too had been taken off the reservation to attend boarding school where he was forced to give up his ways and adopt English.#
- I speculate that Benjamin has been relatively successful by Dineh standards. He has been guiding since 1989, first part time while working other jobs, and full time for the last two decades. The pandemic hit the reservation hard, not just economically, but in the loss of friends and family. He told me he now has a Hogan (house) about 8 miles above the canyon where he keeps horses. He rents the horses out to other Dineh that use them to round up cattle or guide tourists like myself into the canyon.#
- Benjamin spoke slowly, and poetically. He was respectful when speaking of the scientific knowledge of experts like geologist and anthropologist, and reverential when sharing the spiritual knowledge passed to him by his ancestors. As he showed us the pictographs and petroglyphs that adorned the canyon walls, he explained the difference and what they meant to the the people that had left their marks. He spoke of a complex web of life that have been evolving in the canyon since the age of the Pyramids, and continues to this day.#
- We learned how deer were run down, exhausted and trapped in box canyons, to be killed by covering their mouth and suffocating them by hand. That was the way if they were to be used in sacred rituals, otherwise spears, arrows and later guns were used, if for meat. We learned that Massacre cave is so named for the brutal slaughter of women and children by the Spanish Conquistators while the men were away on a hunting trip, but also how the brave Dineh woman had fought the Spanish in hand to hand combat, dragging them off the cliff to fall nearly a thousand feed to their death in suicidal combat to protect their children. We learned the legend of Spider Rock, and the Spider Woman who lived there and punished misbehaving children by carrying them to the top and spinning her web to entrap them. And we learned of how Kit Carson and the army attacked the Dineh destroying their crops and killing all livestock to starve them out of the canyons and force them on the Long Walk to reservations.#
- We also learned that these struggles continue today. The Dineh are but the most recent people to occupy Canyon De Chelly. Before them, the Hopi had lived there- but the Dineh drove them off and took the land for themselves. We were told that even today the conflict between Hopi and Dineh over land continues- as it has between “us and them” since the white man appeared on this continent. And the struggle continues in the landscape itself, with battles against invasive species such as Russian Olive trees which were brought in for flood control, but have grown like weeds. And the challenges of an ever-changing river bottom from the summer monsoons which flood the canyons.#
- Our time with Benjamin was short. And while there were great photo opportunities, we really treasured the stories he imparted to us and his manner doing so. Canyon De Chelly and Del Mureto are much more meaningful places to us now. Leaving the landscape and few Dineh that we have met for such a brief time leaves me with a sense of our impermanence. Perhaps I should quit thinking of these people as “the first people” and we as the ones that colonized them and put them on to reservations- although that is true. While here I have been empathetic to the economic challenges of building wealth in a remote place like this, where jobs are few and the land values don’t rise because it is a reservation and the canyon itself is federally protected property. It is difficult to “get ahead” here.#
- But who am I to judge the lives of these people. Thinking of all the crazy things going on in our world, there is a good chance they will survive deeper into the future. They have been toughened to adapt their ways to a changing world, and live in this unforgiving landscape. When all that we have, melts into air, perhaps they will still be here? But I am also left with a strengthening of the sense that regardless of our governments, and the competition between men, we are all “the people.” I continue in my own beliefs that we are all embedded within a beautiful biosphere, living on earth and sharing a common story of creation. I am happy to carry away a simple rock painting, a small canvas painting, and some wonderful photographs by Mary Ann. But most of all, a few memories of some interesting people- people that ultimately are no different than me- each unique and beautiful in their own way. As I drive away, the emotion of equanimity grows slowly stronger, because we showed them the respect they deserve.#
A good day to continue this float down Life's Rivers. My journey down river with Drummer has led me into the Twitter steam. Fun and adventure await around every bend in the river... :)#
- Dave- I am glad you are in this world writing Scripting News and creating Drummer.#
- A long time reader of Scripting News, I fell away from it during the peak of my career when my focus shifted, and returned more recently. To my delight I learned you had created Drummer and dove right in. It was easy to install, although I have avoided Twitter so that part was a mystery to me. So far I have not explored the relationship between Drummer and Twitter.#
- I read constantly and have long harbored a dream of writing- and you gave me the ideal platform to kick start that effort. Thank you very much. My purpose is simple. I am writing primarily for my grandchildren, and secondarily for a few friends. I have no need or desire to create a brand or build a community. Like you I am crafting words these days primarily for myself. The only way people read my writing is if I send them an email with a link. I am thankful for the occasional feedback a few friends send my way.#
- You asked for feedback, and I have not provided any because Drummer is Free! You seem busy to me and I don’t feel I have a right to ask for features or complain. And I am gun shy about asking questions for fear of having missed something in the Docs. Frankly, I would rather pay for Drummer, because then I would have more confidence the product would be around for awhile. I hope you never pull the plug (and make arrangements for your servers to continue beyond you! :)#
- I plan to get into Dakota (and AWS and PagePark) at some point, but right now I am putting my creative energy into songwriting and guitar. I have discovered some really great music software and am having a blast expanding my knowledge of music theory and technical chops. I never realized songwriting could be so fun and it has become very complimentary to my writing effort. They are beginning to feed on each other.#
- As for tree charts, I don’t need them in retirement and if I did I would create them myself using design software. As you know, Architects are very finicky about little things like line weights, font control, subtle colors, the exact right kind of arrows etc. Also, over the years I have transitioned away from tree charts to complex systems diagrams where relationships between objects are equally important and ideas cannot be expressed in hierarchy.#
- There are capabilities in drummer I would like to see, but again I am hesitate to say so. I would like to compose images more easily, arrange short stories into larger multiple interlinked themes, and I would like to create a portfolio of my work, and be able to publish my songs. These are big asks and they are not in tune with your efforts. So I will happily make do with Drummer as is and accept whatever you do. Plus, as I have said before- now I have the capabilities of a great outliner in my hands. Thank you very much!#
- Ken#
- PS- Thanks for the recent tip about bookmarks!#
- Can Humanity Change?
The jury is still out on that one. Can you and I change? Yes absolutely. I for example have turned over so many new leaves in my life- I tell my wife I am a now a whole new tree! And still I have lots of room for improvement- and whole new branches yet to grow.# - We are currently on a road trip, and that means I need a good book for those moments when Mary Ann has hopped out of the truck to take a picture (sometimes before I even stop rolling!) So when I found a book claiming we can “Architect our Character” and that “Psychitecture can take a mind that is like a prison and gradually transform it into a Palace” I was hooked. #
- Designing The Mind | The Principles of Psychitecture
is one of those books that I have savored; soaking it up, and absorbing it bit-by-bit. Perfect for a road trip when you have lots of time to mull things over, pondering new insights and considering how they fit into your life. This is one of those books I wish I had read when young, and now want to send a copy to all my friends! # - Filled with references to classical Stoicism, Buddhism and western inquiries into the nature of mind, author Ryan Bush- a systems designer and thinker- synthesizes ancient knowledge with modern cognitive science and leverages the analogy of algorithms from computer science to explain how we can literally reprogram the code running in our minds.#
When we understand the mind as a biological “machine” that has millions of years of “code” embedded in- and the interaction of sub-systems that make up the whole- we can consciously and objectively “step through” that code to observe how it works. And with a little (or in some cases a lot) of effort, we can “reprogram” the automatic “chain of algorithms” to bring forth alternative behaviors of our own design. That is a powerful idea! #- Mary Ann and I
will soon begin our trip home, and I have been saving the final few chapters for our return trip. Already, I have managed to “reprogram” a couple of behaviors that have left me smiling. In one case I was able to short circuit a situation that previously would have raised my ire. In another, I withheld judgement and saved a friendship- no small matter in todays world where we are increasingly polarized by the news!# - If you are like me, and feel you can benefit from turning over a few new leafs, check this book out! You can learn more from a free PDF download from the Designing The Mind website. The author also sends out emails occasionally that are worth signing up for.#
- Let me know what you think, and have fun drifting down Life’s Rivers!#
- A lifelong dream realized- and having more fun than i could have imagined! This morning, I said "good enough" and published my first song to the Internet. GarageBand has a built in link to SoundCloud, so I gave it a go- check out Tiamat on SoundCloud. It is free, and you don't need an account. Please let me know if it works, and if you enjoy it?#
This is my first time using HookPad and GarageBand to create a song. My first time recording vocals and mixing. My first time attempting to master and publish a song. Like any endeavor worth pursuing, I have mostly learned how much I have yet to learn. And could benefit from some voice lessons!#- Next step will be recording this again with guitar- that will force discipline and technique into my guitar playing. I think I will practice around the campfire on our upcoming trip for awhile... Cheers.#
- First Feedback#
- "Well Ken, there are a few sour notes in there..." HaHa- so true! Did I mention voice lessons? :) #
- And a request for the Lyrics:#
- Every River And #
- Every Star And#
- Every Animal Is Singing#
- Song and a Prayer#
- Every Person And#
- Every Wave And#
- Every Particle Is Loving#
- Time and this Feeling #
- #
- Flaring Forth from Tiamat#
- One Story for Mankind#
- Born from Galactic Star Dust#
- Living and Building Day Time#
- Bathed in Beautiful Star Light#
- Loving and Dreaming Night Time#
- We are Children of the Universe#
- Awake in Space and Time#
- #
- Every Flower And#
- Every Moon And#
- Every Covenant Is Binding#
- All of us Together#
- Every Mother And#
- Every Child And#
- Every One of Us Is a Gift#
- From TiaMat#
- #
- Flaring Forth from Tiamat#
- One Story for Womankind#
- Born from Galactic Star Dust#
- Living and Healing Day Time#
- Bathed in Beautiful Star Light#
- Loving and Dreaming Night Time#
- We are Children of the Universe#
- Awake on Earth in Love#
- A little backstory on Tiamat, and the source of my inspiration...#
- As old friend recently reminded me, back in the day “pulling an all nighter” meant you had stayed up all night in some Herculean effort like preparing for an exam or finishing a design project. Today, pulling an all nighter is the Herculean effort of sleeping all night!#
- When we are young, deep sleep and dream time come easily. A hard day of play leads to deep sleep and vivid dreams, while growing muscles and neurons. It turns out that as we age, the peaceful sleep of youth is more difficult. And the modern world has brought us additional challenges with artificial light, highly competitive work stressors, driving commutes, flights across time zones, digital screen time, and best of all- high quality caffeine! #
- But we males have one additional and wholly natural curse that impacts our sleep as we age.
After an initial growth spurt in puberty, we have an otherwise wonderful sexual organ that takes a short break, and then it resumes growing again in midlife. I am talking about our Prostrate! Hell, I didn’t even know if was there until the Doctor started poking around to see how large it was!# - The prostate can cause lots of problems for men- Cancer among them. But for most men, myself included, the growing prostate puts pressure on the bladder- which causes frequent urination, especially at night- wrecking blissful sleep and dream time. As a consequence of this malady, I have been researching prostate and bladder health. (See references below.) But what has interested me the most is sleep itself- what is it, why do we do it, and how can I get better at what used to come so naturally?#
- Why We Sleep#
- Why We Sleep is an excellent book by sleep researcher Matthew Walker, PhD. It turns out that Sleep is likely our natural primordial state, and wakefulness is an adventure into daylight from which we retreat on a daily basis to heal ourselves and prepare for the next day. From our lives in the womb until old age, our sleep evolves and changes as we grow older. And the rhythm of sleep itself has changed as homo sapiens evolved into the social animals that currently rule over planet Earth- all made possible by sleep.#
- Broadly speaking, we have two basic types of sleep; REM sleep (Rapid Eye Movement) is when we are dreaming, and NREM sleep (Non-Rapid Eye Movement) is when we are “healing.” It is more complicated than this (as I show below) but for simplicity, I will refer to them as Dream Sleep and Healing Sleep.#
- Healing Sleep is made up of a couple of phases we pass through from Light Sleep to Deep Sleep and back again.
Thought of musically, light sleep is chaotic while in deep sleep a brain rhythm can be actually be “heard” that signals the work of healing and growth. It is during deep sleep that we cement our daily experience into long-term memories and grow new neural connections. Healing sleep also “processes” our daily experience with our fellow primates, critically examining social relationships, especially facial and bodily gestures to deepen our survival skills by better perceiving our social space.# - Dream Sleep also serves specific functions. During dream sleep, the voluntary control of our muscles is “turned off” along with the cognitive functions of our “higher” brain. Dream sleep turns a spotlight on our emotional life, with the evolutionary advantage of dampening sour memories of bad emotional experiences.#
- But what was most fascinating to me about Dr. Walker’s book, was the other functions of dream sleep- problem solving and creativity! Thanks to the magic of Magnetic Resonance Imaging (MRI) researchers like Dr. Walker have spent the last 20 years creating scientific experiments in sleeping laps and actually observing the specific activities that occur within the brain of sleeping sapiens. We now know that while the dreams we remember upon waking may not make sense to us logically, they are in fact a larger picture of the web of our lives and facilitate solving complex messy problems and creating wholly new works of art.#
- Especially interesting to me, is the fact of lucid dreaming, where the sleeper is conscious, and to some degree, n control of the content of their dreams. Ironically, having read about this last night before sleep, I had the experience of lucid dreaming early this morning. But I will be dammed if my logical brain can figure out what it all means at this point!#
- These are simply some of the take aways from Why We Sleep. There is so much more here; about the problems with sleeping pills and alcohol, the dangers of lack of sleep, and solid advice on how to get better sleep. I recommend this book if any of this has sparked your imagination or curiosity.#
- Links to a few books I found helpful:#
- Why We Sleep | Unlocking the Power of Sleep and Dreams by Steven Walker, PhD#
- Sleep Interrupted by Steven Y. Park, M.D.#
- Healing the Prostate by Dr. Mark Stengler#
- Wearable Tech#
- In my effort to improve my sleep, I needed better information about how I was actually sleeping, and a method to test our the result of various efforts to improve my sleep. Consequently, since I needed a new wedding ring, I decided to invest in an Oura Ring which I now wear on my ring finger.#
- The Oura Ring is my first foray into Wearable Tech. Every morning when I get up now, the first thing I do is launch the Oura app on my iPhone. My ring and phone talk to each other for a minute and presto, I have a full report on what actually occurred during my sleep along with a wide variety of other data about my health that is monitored throughout the day. Soon, they will even be reporting oxygen levels- which means of course an upgrade from V3 to V4!#
- Much like how we are unable to remember most of our dreams, our knowledge of our sleep is actually much fuzzier than we might think. And of course, alarm clocks, caffeine, sugar and artificial lights actually help to mask our knowledge and understanding of our sleep. I confess to being wary of the impacts of technology, but at the same time I have benefited from this particular technology by measuring and better understanding my sleep, which has been slowly improving over the last several months.#
- The Pacific Northwest gray rainy days are getting old- time to head south for a little warmth and sun!
Our destination is Colorado, where Aletheia awaits us- except now she is a walking (almost talking) little Homo Sapien! Can't wait to hold her in my arms again! And of course being with Shannon, and playing guitar with my son-in-law Mike! The return trip is wide open. Life is good.#
- All Sapiens Design. It is part of what makes us Human- to have some idea in mind of a future outcome, and then set upon a course to make it so. As a professional Architect, I had the great fortune of three years in Architecture School where we studied the Architecture gods like Frank Loyd Wright and worshipped at the altar of Design Process. And I was then lucky enough to earn a livelihood and practice this art as a professional being paid by clients to deliver ideas that could be built, or sold to their clients.#
- Today I am realizing a long held dream of designing my own music, and am struck by the universality of the design process I studied to become a professional designer. Looking back, it is really a simple process. Beginning with a concept, one travels a paths from very loose general ideas to increasingly more specific ideas that are tested against the original concept. Then adjustments are made, sometimes starting over and traveling a different path. Rinse and repeat until you find yourself with a "solution" that is “good enough.” The hardest part is to just start down a path without assurance that it will lead you to want to go, but having the confidence in yourself to know that you will get there, eventually. What architecture school adds to this universal human process is the various tools of the craft that are unique to architecture; likewise computer science, engineering and all the other design arts.#
- These days, I am studying music theory and the various music gods I have enjoyed over the years along with the tools of the music craft. Much has changed since I learned the art of architecture. Back then we did everything by hand, and of course today- very little is done by hand. I am benefitting by access to great music software at little or no cost such as HookPad and GarageBand respectively. But thankfully, there is still a place for human craft in music and I am finding that the biggest limitations (and perhaps strengths) are my voice and guitar.#
- I have been working on my first song on and off for about two months now- and having a blast. Like my first projects in architecture school, it is very sophomoric and has a lot of room for improvement. But it is uniquely mine, and the simple act of designing/writing music is making me a better musician, just as the act of designing/drawing architecture makes one a better architect; by integrating theory and craft into real world results and learning from them.#
- In architecture, we have many options to integrate the basic systems of envelope, structure, interiors and services (mechanical, electrical, plumbing etc.) In music, we have a dizzying array of options with lyrics, melody, harmony and rhythm. Where does one begin? The answer for me is everywhere all at once! Nothing is precedent and everything has to be solved together- that is what makes design so challenging, and so much fun! #
- The last two months of trial and error have taught me a lot. Software tools have enabled me to learn and try out music theory ideas that are finally taking root in my brain. My first song has evolved from just hunting for chords that seem to work, into specific keys and an order of chords with a concept in mind. At first in G Major, but then shifting to C Major for the Chorus and its relative minor for the Verses. Three months ago I had no idea why I might want to do so. (Now I am puzzling how to transition between the verse and the chorus.)#
- Interesting to me also is the relationship between what can be accomplished digitally, versus the human body. I learned that using Hookpad and GarageBand I could come up with something that was fairly interesting musically, but very difficult to sing with my voice, or play on my guitar. That in turn provides real world constraints (as in architecture) that inform the evolution of the music, making it better and something that can be performed live, with an audience as the final judge- just as in architecture, when humans finally walk inside and experience the space you have created.#
- As with any design process, you go back and forth, refining and testing ideas. The trick is knowing how to guide this process, to let it unfold in an order that results in something that is full of “life.” This is exactly what the theorist Christopher Alexander was writing and thinking about in “The Order of Nature.” And the results are all around us in the great works of Architecture and Music (and the other design Arts…)#
- While my first song is still evolving, I am already dreaming about my next song… and thinking it will be much moodier, about one of my best friends that died in a whirlpool on a river- written in the Key of G, using the Phrygian mode, searching for the Spanish Gypsy / Spaghetti Western sound. #
- I feel like a child beginning Kindergarten all over again… :) #
- I knew it at the time, but it took many years to understand why. Having learned taiji (aka Tai Chi- "supreme ultimate") from Paul Pitchford, I was never able to find another teacher the equal of him. And that is saying something since I subsequently studied taiji for seven years with a grandmaster living in Portland that is famous throughout China. (But that is another story.)#
- Paul is best known as the author of the classic book,
Healing with Whole Foods | Asian Traditions and Modern Nutrition. I met Paul years before he wrote his classic, when he was teaching taiji in Moscow Idaho, and leading healing retreats in the mountains of Northern Idaho. I would make the short drive from Pullman Washington (where I was studying Architecture) to Moscow every Tuesday and Thursday evening for a class with Paul. # 
Like many people my age, I was introduced to martial arts by the TV show Kung Fu starring David Carradine. A trip to the library led me to a little book about taiji, from which I learned the simple exercise of "walking on rice paper." Years later when a college roomate said someone was teaching taiji in Moscow, I jumped on the opportunity- and was not dissapointed. #- Paul was a western Caucasian, but he learned and taught in the tradition of Taoism. He was not only skilled at taijichuan, but also a practitioner of eastern medicine; blending Chinese 5 element theory with Japanese shiatsu while reading our pulse and teaching us about the macrobiotic diet. More importantly, in addition to the long and short solo forms of traditional Yang style taiji, we also taijichuan (aka Tai Chi Chuan, or “supreme ultimate boxing”) by practicing the two person training forms of push hands and sanshou. Paul taught the martial taoist first principle of selfdefense- which is a responsibility to teach and heal your duaifang (aka your "opposite" in battle, better thought of as your partner, rather than your opponent.)#
- Now 44 years after first learning from Paul, my practice of taiji is still inspired by him. As I learned from John Denver's bodyguard, taijichuan is truly the best martial art for older peolple. It remains and excels as a functional martial art as we age, and is a tremendous means to extend vitality into old age, as taught by the imortal Taoist masters of Ancient China. Tai Chi as it is taught today, has largely become a Performing Art- not a martial art. I was lucky to learn taijichuan as a Taoist martial art, and owe it all to Paul Pitchford.#
- Spoiler alert- Don't Look Up is too realistic for comfort! This movie is the perfect analogy for our times, and we have every reason to believe the movie's ending is the only ending possible for our species. For the ending of this movie is a beautiful teaching- gather together with the ones you love, share your last meal; and accept fate with grace and equanimity.#
- It give me great sadness to say these things, for I so deeply love my children and grandchildren and wish for them a long life, prosperity, and all the pleasures of Mother Earth. Sadly, that will not be the case. I fear the best we can do is prepare them to be fully present to what remains of our biosphere, and to love their family and friends; until they too share their last meal together, and accept their fate with grace and equanimity.#
- In the final moments of the movie, our heroes believe they have done everything possible to try and avert disaster- and indeed they have! The forces at work governing the human system of systems are vast, evolutionary, and beyond the ability of sapiens (the so called "wise ones") to effect the change some of them desire. The myths of progress, technology and economy are far too entrenched in the species at large. In rare moments when I dare to "hope" (which is admitting a lack of agency)- I believe the only chance for our species is a complete collapse of global industrial civilization- now! But frankly, I have come to believe that the momentum of Earth's Living Systems is such that even with a complete collapse, it will be extremely difficult for any Sapiens to survive.#
- One big difference between "Don't Look Up" and things as they actually are, is that mathematics can precisely pinpoint when a planet killing Comet will impact earth; whereas we do not have the computational capability to predict when Earth's Living Systems will tip out of the current stability regime that has been so favorable for human life. Perhaps that is a blessing- for none of us will know our precise future, only the general arc of our demise.#
- In conclusion, I remind myself to Live and Love my loved ones; and enjoy what is left of the grandeurs of our beautiful biosphere. I do not believe that a war with the external enemy can be won, because that enemy has already harnessed the forces of the biosphere for its own destruction and like all elites throughout human history, will do everthing possible to remain in power. Perhaps now, instead of chanting Don't Look Up- the only option available to us is to simply Look Inward?#
- PS- I hope to hell I am WRONG about this!#
- My grandfather used to say that- and on this New Years day I have something to share. At the ripe old age of 64, I have recorded my first song! Inspired by The Universe Story, it is named for Tiamat, the second generation star that was born over 10 billion years ago. Tiamat lived about 5 billion years and then exploded in a supernova that lit the universe for 7 days. She gave birth to everything in the Milky Way- so in a very real way, we truly are the stardust of Tiamat. #
- Tiamat
# - Every river and every star #
- Every person and every wave #
- Flaring Forth from Tiamat, the Story of all Time#
- Every Mother and Every Child#
- The good news it that like a majestic Steelhead caught and released, a song can continue to grow over time. I intend to refine this song as I dig deeper into music theory and practice the craft and my guitars. If you are curious to hear Taimat- drop me a line and I will send you the recording.#
- Happy New Year!#
- Very sad news today that Edward O. Wilson passed away Sunday, December 26th. at the age of 92. Although I enjoyed many books by him, my favorite by far was Consilience.
I will never forget reading the last paragraph of the last chapter as my flight was descending into Portland Oregon- sitting in the window seat with Mt. Hood standing there in all of it's glory. In Conscilience, E.O. Wilson called for the unity of the Humanities and Sciences in order for us sapiens to achieve a sustainable future in this beautiful biosphere that gave birth to us, and all we have accomplished. Edward O. Wilson was a gift to humanity and science, and his absence is a black hole in our world. #
- Likewise, another call for Consilience comes from Christopher Alexander in his series on The Phenomena of Life. In this four volume set, he identifies a set of design principles that lead to the unfolding of human designed artifacts with the quality of Life- and demonstrates how these principles operate throughout all scales of our natural world.#
Most architects I know do not care for Christopher Alexander. I think this is largely because through his Pattern Language, he demonstrated that everyone has access to the tools that lead to good design- not just professionals. I think also that in his work they do not see Architecture- with an upper case "A." For my part I always appreciated C. Alexander, not only because Mary Ann and I utilized his pattern language in our design work, but also because of the deep influence his concept of "patterns" had on software development.#
- In The Phenomena of Life, C. Alexander identifies 15 fundamental properties and expounds upon them over the course of 4 volumes! It is quite a tome that I am happy to have in my library and review from time to time. I have returned to the 15 properties recently as I embark upon new design thinking- both for my home/yard remodel, and for the music I am learning to create. In order to fully appreciate them, you need to read the book(s,) but I think creative types will recognize a degree of truth in the following Fifteen Fundamental Properties of Life (and Design):#
- 1) Levels of Scale#
- 2) Strong Centers#
- 3) Boundaries#
- 4) Alternating Repetition#
- 5) Positive Space#
- 6) Good Shape#
- 7) Local Symmetries#
- 8) Deep Interlock and Ambiguity#
- 9) Contrast#
- 10) Gradients#
- 11) Roughness#
- 12) Echoes#
- 13) The Void#
- 14) Simplicity and Inner Calm#
- 15) Not Separateness#
- I plan to return to these Principles in future writing as I continue digging deeper into design and music, science and humanity.#
- Mary Ann and I are on our annual holiday trip to the Dosewallip River and we have fresh steelhead on the menu! Yesterday was a good day- I got lucky, and managed to catch my limit right off the bat. It has been way too long since I last did so, but then it has been awhile since I worked hard at fishing for steelhead.
The reason is simple- too many fisherman, and too few fish. I feel sorry for the fish- not the fisherman! Up in Washington State, most of the steelhead rivers are closed for fishing due to poor fish counts. As a consequence, my good friend Travis Reeves, his wife Maddy (5 months pregnant) and I hired a couple of young native guides to take us on the Quinalt Reservation on the west side of the Olympic Pinninusla. The tribe has a strong hatchery system and natives can make a little extra money guiding. I make it a general rule to not hire guides- but this was the exception to the rule that felt right, and I was happy to pay these two young native guides- and eat fresh Steelhead again. That makes for a very happy camper!#
This holiday season, I have much to be thankful for- but the best present I have given to myself and my loved ones- is I finally quit drinking (and smoking pot!)#- I cannot claim that it was all self discipline because I got pretty sick, surprisingly enough with Cannabinoid Hyperemesis Syndrome. But I knew I was drinking too much and it was the right time. What really did it for me was knowing how much it would extend the time left to spend with the girls in my life; Mary Ann, Roseanna and Shannon; and most especially my granddaughers Aubi and Aletheia!
Aletheia is our youngest granddaughter born to Shannon and Mike, and living in Colorado. Aubi is our oldest granddaughter born to Roseanna and Skyler, and living only 8 miles away. Aubi is the 9 year old photographer that captured and edited these before and after pictures of me! Quite the change! HaHa :)# - "It's a question of WON'T -POWER!"#
- Those are the words of my Grandpa and the real secret of how I managed to go cold turkey. From him I learned how to drink, and from him I learned how to quit. You just have to make up your mind.
Grandpa Leo Beckwith was married to Lulu Boyd, and they are the source of most of my genes. From Leo, I acquired a love for the dark brown liquor of his Scottish homeland. He was an Ironworker and an Outdoorsman; he taught me the ways of hunting, fishing, and cussing! He was also a horser-whisperer and knew how to coddle a baby. Grandpa quit drinking in his mid 40's after a bar fight in Northern Idaho. It was the first fight he ever lost, and the last. I am so incredibly thankful to him for the time he spent with me- and now my main goal in life is to spend that kind of quality time with my granddaughters! Leo (and I) a long time ago with a Steelhead he took from the Snake River, in Hells Canyon, Idaho.# - #
- "I have found two pieces of rare beauty. I am most grateful."#
- It was my job to mentor the young designers in sustainable design (daylighting in this case,) but it was they that taught me the power of Rhino! Having seen first hand how Rhino handles complex geometry in the hands of these youngsters, I took it upon myself to explore Grasshopper. #
- In one weekend, I surveyed the visual scripting environment, and the next weekend I tackled the design problem- spreading daylight from a large overhead aperatures in the roof of SFO Terminal 1- while minimizing glare and heat gain from the sun.#
- The results speak for themselves- and I was hooked! It is also somehow fitting that the solution looks a bit like a classic western hat! Too bad it was never built- but that's the thing about generative design- it's easy to design expensive solutions! Moving forward, I have some more practical design problems I will be pursuing, and having fun along the way!#
- Wow- it all works! #
- And it is Beautifull, Amazing, Wonderful, Extraordinary, Beautiful!#
- I am delighted with the ease of my transition to the Mac. Congratulations to Dave Winer (Scripting News) for Electric Drummer, and the team at Rhino/Grasshopper for their Mac implementation. And of course, congratualtions to Steve Jobs and Steve Wozniac for the legacy of design and engineering they left behind.#
- The Fun is just Beginning!#
- Way back in the early 80's I began using Apple computers on a Lisa, which was soon followed by an original 128K Mac! Unfortunately, professional CAD applications in those days required mainframes, then Unix machines and finally the PC. I was locked into the PC by various CAD applications for over three decades. Yuch!
Now at last I have returned to my roots with a MacBook Pro which arrived yesterday. And of course the whole experience of unwrapping the packaging and setting it up has been a delight. Setting up email took a little doing, and it turns out my HP 11X17 LaserJet is a little too old- but I can live with that! Next step is to test SketchUp and Rhino on the new MacOS, and then I will move on to setting up my "KronoLog" using Drummer as a Mac App. After that, GarageBand, Grasshopper and back to design work. Retirement is "Beautiful, Amazing, Wonderful, Extraordinary, and Beautiful!"#
- How do your fears or hopes about humanity’s future affect your actions? What is your personal definition of “hope”?#
- The concept of hope has been a thorn in my side for some time now. I think hope is the opposite of agency. Hope is a weak emotion that arises when you have lost the ability to take meaningful action, it arises when there is nothing else you can do but hope. Fear on the other hand is a strong emotion. It is primal- keyed to our survival and can take control over our minds driving a person into rage, literally causing them to lose their mind. The opposite of fear, or perhaps contained within fear, is courage. Hope is a desperate attempt to avoid despair- the emotion that arises when a person has given up all hope and fallen into depression, despondency and or deep sadness. Fear serves to activate the fight or flight instinct, which can save our lives. But long term worries about the future give rise to long term anxieties and can eat away at our spirit.#
- Is it any wonder that so many of us turn to hope in a desperate effort to avoid the fear and anxiety that arise with knowledge of the probable future of humanity and life on Earth? This is why hope has been a thorn in my side for some time now.#
- I fear that what we have to fear is in fact radical fear. We face not just the loss of our life eventually, but probably the loss of our way of life before that. Worse yet, we face the knowledge of the loss of our culture, civilization and very possibly our species in the not-too-distant future! Is it any wonder that we choose to stay inside a warm cabin and listen to the music rather than go out on the cold deck and climb into a life raft and take the plunge into the chilly dark water?#
- From this radical fear, I choose to exercise my emotional muscle of Radical Hope. I choose to exercise my consciousness as a cultural shaman and imagination activist. I invite a new dream into our world, a dream of courage to face the coming storms. A dream that acknowledges we do not know the path to this new place, and the trail will be long and full of tears. A dream of radical hope that nevertheless; humanity will survive and flourish in love with life, in harmony with Earth, and fully awake in conversation with the Universe.#
- A Zoom Call with Jon Anderson#
- As a subscriber to Jon's Patreon page, I was delighted to receive an announcement that Jon was going to host a Zoom call titled "Ask Me Anything." A question has been burning in my mind. There was no way I was going to miss this call!#
- My Question#
- I prepared this question for Jon in advance and raised my hand when our Zoom meeting started. He looked at my pixelated face, said Hi Ken, and asked what my question was?#
- Hi Jon,#
- Like everyone on this call, I have so many words and melodies running through my consciousness thanks to you. Your presence on stage, your Songs have enriched all of us- all of these years.#
- Recently, you posted videos in protest of the terrible events in Ukraine (Song for Peace), you created a powerful protest song telling the the politicians and wall street tycoons to go and Screw themselves, and most recently you gifted us with the fun and uplifting story of Charlie and the Sun Stealers (on Patreon).#
- I believe in the power of story and music to change peoples minds and hearts as you have been doing all these years. When thinking about Global Heating, the 6th Planetary Extinction and Violence in our Societies, we desperately need new stories, dreams and visions to sustain us through the times ahead.#
- My question is… Do you have any advice for aspiring songwriters that want to take on this challenge? And have you ever considered offering an online class for songwriters?#
- Thank you for your time and energy.#
- Jon's Answer#
- What did Jon say to my questions? “Nope and Nope.” Then he proceeded to talk to me for the next 15 minutes as he went on to answer my questions. He said we are everlasting beings and we live many lives. That I needed to look into my heart and find my own way. That all I needed to do was look at the great writers of lyrics and music, like the Beatles and Paul Simon. That for him, he had been lucky. He had found a way to create spiritually based compositions that expressed the potential of human experience. That all we need to do is wake up and dream the idea of life.#
- Jon spoke to the sickness in America, that we are hung up on energy and power and money. That we have a fear of death and need to rise to the next level of consciousness. He said that America is sick. That we as a nation need to ask for forgiveness from the Native Americans (and African Americans) for what we did to them. (See Requiem For the Americas remix) That we are living with self inflicted wounds that are causing so much chaos. That we have to get rid of the guns that kill people, over and over again.#
- He then went on to speak of real people that he admired singling out Jon Stewart as brilliant, real and true. He drew attention to the recent Phish concert at Madison Square Gardens and the Waves, Whales and Dolphins that attended. He also mentioned a couple of books by the painter and mystic, Vera Stanley Alder; The Finding of the Third Eye and The Initiation of the World. He also spoke of The Seven Keys to Color Healing by Roland Hunt. Classic Jon Anderson- now I see where he gets his inspiration to paint from. (Check out Sound and Color from the South American tour and band, off the Native American concept album Toltec.)#
- On Recently Departed Friends#
- After that, Jon took other questions and spoke quite a bit about the loss of two of his best musical friends, Alan White and Vangelis. He said Alan was the best man at his wedding, and one the best people he ever knew. He never had a bad word to say about anything. Jon was amazed at how Alan was able to step into the band when Bill Bruford suddenly left. Jon reminded us that Alan cowrote the beautiful Turn of the Century with him and he suggested going back to look at some of the video of Alan on the epic Gates of Delerium - he was a monster drummer! Jon said Alan loved his mom dearly and the last year had been very hard on him. He was looking forward to seeing his mom in heaven again.#
- Of Vangelis, Jon had a lot to say. That he was the best musician Jon ever knew. He loved watching him at his keyboard with his big fat Greek fingers… his music was romantic, powerful, surreal and cosmic! All in one larger than life person. Jon said that Vangelis also carried around with him a cloud in his pocket. He would often pull the cloud out and put it over his head where it would rain down on him. Jon said he also had terrible stage fright, and twice when Jon was in the audience asked him to come up on stage and perform together. They made wonderful music together.#
- Closing#
- There were lots of references to songs from the past. Jon would sing a few words and everyone would guess the song. He spoke of his current concert tours with the young peeps from the Paul Green Rock Academy and music he was working on to be released within days. Jon also soke of the recent Phish concert at Madison Square Gardens with flying whales and dolphins!#
- As always, Jon remains an amazing creative force- an everlasting being full of life and love. A great Sage of Music and the Angel of Rock and Roll. It was a Beautiful, Wonderful, Extraordinary, Amazing Beautiful Experience. Bless his Soul!#
- I perceive a time when grandpa would get down on the floor and tickle me until I cried, then I begged for more. A time when my good friend Dave looked me in the eyes, then gave up his life to the water devil. A time when Mt. St. Helens blew her top, and my future wife melted into my arms. A time when my daughters became women and brought forth daughters of their own. A time when I grew old and melted back into Earth and the Moon, and the Sun and the Stars.#
- All of this is within my consciousness, and the time is now.#
- We are frequently admonished to live in the present- in the now. But honestly, I find this difficult to do. Yes, I can live in the now when I am in the flow; but more often than not, the now contains memories of the past; and anxieties and hopes about the future. Einstein taught us about Relativity, and Star Trek taught us about the Space/Time Continuum. But I think the story of our embodied minds teaches us what it means to be human.#
- From the eastern sciences of consciousness, we have learned how to meditate. How to observe our minds and the thoughts that arise spontaneously. How to quiet our minds, if only for a little bit of time. In the western tradition, we have used the scientific method and technologies like magnetic resonance imaging to look into how our minds operate biologically. We are beginning to understand our embodied minds as vast neural networks that are structurally coupled to our Earthly environments, each with a unique history. Consciousness appears to emerge in a flow of fractal neural patterns; sensations cohere into feelings, which can become moods forming states of mind. Human language allows thoughts to emerge that can cohere into ideas, flowing into attitudes and worldviews about life.#
- This is a huge simplification, an abstraction. And that is what we humans are capable of doing with our embodied minds. We have evolved to tell stories, to abstract our experience of the real world- precisely because the story tellers before us survived and reproduced to tell there stories to us. And I think that at its most fundamental level, it is a story about time. About human time. It is a story about life- because Life eats Life. Like our stories, we have a beginning, a middle and an end. We are connected to all of life- reaching deep into the past, and perhaps deep into the future. Our consciousness arises embodied in our body, with a beginning, a middle, and sadly, an end. I believe our Consciousness ends with the end of our body.#
- I perceive a time when the way of life of indigenous people came to an end and they were forced onto reservations. A time when the sun set on the British Empire. A time when the Roman Empire fell. A time when the civilization on Easter Island collapsed. A time when Western Civilization collapsed. A time when the Human Race overshot the carrying capacity of Earth. A time when we tipped the climate into a runaway greenhouse causing extinction of human beings and most of complex life.#
- All of this is within my consciousness, and the time is now.#
- Which is why sometimes I wish I could just simply live in the here in now, but that seem to be an idealized goal that only a few sages on mountain tops manage to achieve. We ordinary humans bring forth into our consciousness concepts of time as a means to survive, reproduce, and tell our story. We are able to learn from those that came before us from past time, and project our understanding to those that will follow us in future time. And we can act in the here and now to change the course of events that will flow into a possible future.#
- I think these thought because I am driven by instinct to do so. I want my children, and all children down the line to live a good life as I have. With their heartbeats beating to the rhythm of their feet, with blood coursing through their veins as they make love and create new stories for their children. I want them to have all the time in the world.#
- I perceive a time when we look out upon the storm gathering on the horizon and collectively decide to change our minds. A time when we realize Earth is our only home and we better take care of her. A time when we understand we may be alone in the Universe, the first species born to a planet that can language with each other. A time when we learn to fit our needs into the needs of the rest of life, and become a regenerative life force. A time when our species as a whole enters into deep geological time, in conversation with this beautiful planet we call Earth.#
- All of this is within my consciousness, and the time is now.#
- The Deep Purpose of Life#
- Flyfishing for Steelhead and playing Tai Chi have a lot in common. They look silly from outside, but feel great inside. Both require you to step into the great rivers of life and wade in their flow. They take time and practice, but they give you time and patience; to ask questions of yourself. Questions like, what am I? What is the deep purpose of life? What is the Tao in my own nature?#
- How do you relate to the Gaia hypothesis? Do you perceive the Earth as a living being? How does this affect your own relationship with the rest of life on Earth?#
- I see GAIA as a living being in feminine form. I think of her as having birthed all of life, but that is too simple and does not capture her Tao. It is important to see her as both created by life on earth, and the creator and sustainer of life on earth, both yin and yang. She reaches all the way down into the magnetic core, includes all life in the biosphere, hydrosphere and atmosphere; and reaches all the way to the Sun and beyond. Maybe GAIA is best thought of as Great Grandmother?#
- Where do you see the forces of entropy and/or negentropy playing out in our day-to-day lives (socially, environmentally, personally)?#
- The Taoist masters of ancient times were funny creatures. But modern Physicist have outdone them with silly terms like Entropy and Negentropy! Why not just call them Yin and Yang?#
- Entropy is Yang, energy dissipating, increasing disorder. We see entropy everywhere. Societies are breaking down as so-called social networking addicts humans to dopamine hits and destroys social cohesion with anger. The rich diversity and complexity of natural ecosystems are simplified into monocrops polluted by chemical inputs. Fossil fuels safely sequestered underground, are dug up and burned dissipating energy and heating Earth. The life force in all of us and our creations, declines continually, requiring energy and maintenance til the end.#
- Negentropy is Yin, energy concentrating, increasing order. I prefer to view Negentropy as Einstein framed it- CosmoGenesis: the creation of the cosmos and life within it. Civilization has created great works of art, architecture, music; and has literally probed the universe to make meaningful order of it within our minds. We are witness to new ways of relating to the environment with sustainable design, a return to organic farming, and beginning to recognize the “legal rights” of other species, and even places as entities. Western science has embraced eastern science and now recognizes the life force within us all is real- creating new tools and methods to heal illnesses in whole beings, and extend life. #
- If humanity were to be invited to join “The United Federation of Planets,” what would we have to do to make ourselves ready?#
- The story of one person illustrates what is required of all of us- together. Hellen Keller suffered an unknown disease at the very young age of 19 months that left her blind and deaf. Thanks to a gifted teacher, she experienced a miraculous transformation in her mind. One magical day she suddenly began to “language” with her teacher in a flash of inspiration that opened up the entire universe to her, with one simple word spelled out in braille on her hand, ‘water.’#
- In order to join the United Federation of Planets, the human race must likewise transform itself, and join into “languaging” with Earth, GAIA, or better yet, Great Grandmother. And to me, ‘water’ seems like good a place to start.#
- The Tao in my Own Nature#
- I met a man on the river one day. After talking for awhile he said he knew me, he said I was a “Russian pessimist.” I asked him what a Russian pessimist was? He said a Russian pessimist is someone who believes things can get worse than they already are. He knew me alright. But no more.#
- Consider a current cultural attractor (e.g. consumerism, the #MeToo movement or Black Lives Matter), and how you relate to it. Can you identify elements of it that are more general, and those that are more specific to your own unique experience?#
- It has been all too easy for me to be a pessimist. The cultural attractors that drew my attention were big ideas like environmentalism, collapse theory, planetary extinction, and the loss of everything specific that I loved in the natural world; beautiful, wonderful extraordinary, amazing beautiful living creatures and landscapes. As an outdoorsman, I have indigenous experience with the destruction of our fellow creatures. As an architect, I have professional experience with the destruction of our natural landscapes.#
- Which phase in the Adaptive Cycle Model do you think our civilization is in right now?#
- The Adaptive Cycle Model is a powerful idea (cultural attractor) to think with about our civilization, and ourselves. Like an ‘egregore,’ is it associated with a shape, an infinity symbol with similarities to the yin-yang circle. The idea/symbol has the power to help us understand transformations in human and natural systems. The model is well understood from a western scientific perspective, and worthy of meditation from an eastern spiritual perspective.#
- Taken as a whole, our civilization is clearly well within the conversation phase, on the cusp of a radical release into a transformative reorganization. Like yin and yang, there is much to be excited about, and much to fear. Such is the Tao.#
- What is an attractor of consciousness that you can identify in yourself? How might you want to reshape this attractor through intention? #
- Pessimism and fear have been defining characteristics in my worldview. But no longer. I choose to consciously rearchitect the neural connectivity of my mind/body. I choose to embrace “water” as Helen Keller did; and keep waking up- over and over again- to the flow I am embedded in; until I return to the Tao. My intention is to deepen my practice of Tai Chi (and teach my grandchildren how to fish). My intention is to use “consciousness to refine consciousness” as the internal martial arts of Taoism teach- a whole mind/body reshaping of a whole mind/body. In this way, I can harmonize with others, and together we have the potential achieve the transformation of humanity and be invited to join the United Federation of Planets.#
- Yours truly, Ken Hall ( No longer a Russian Pessimist :)#
- How the Tao of Systems Thinking informs the interbeing, and ethical questions about the places we live...#
- Designers Whitney-Hall#
- We are a yin-yang design team. Mary Ann and I are grateful we had the skill and opportunity to design our own home together- over three decades ago. We applied the conceptual knowledge we learned as architects, and our animate intuitions and shared values. We have learned much from our home since then. This is what it says to us today...#
- Tao Generates One#
- "I emerged from the great void, brought into the universe in a natural unfolding process of design and construction. The land on which I live is a south facing slope, perfect to tuck into the hill and keep warm while peeking out at the sun in the winter. The sloping street next to me rose to a mound and then descended to a rain swale across the width of me. That, together with lack of financial resources imparted a frugal nature to my existence that limited what I could become. Constraints are a source of creativity from which I benefitted. Constraints generate solutions."#
- One Generates Two#
- "Yang energies forced me into straight lines for simple construction and less wasted materials. Bulldozers prepared my earth pad with a balanced cut-and-fill to save energy and earth material. Industrial civilization provided hookups for my sewage wastage off-site. Electrical inputs are from local hydraulic dams which lower my carbon footprint. Not all of my materials are harmless, but the insulation tempers heat loss and gain, and in general I am small, using less of everything. Small is beautiful."#
- "Yin energies provide me with living qualities. I mimic the conifer tree’s to shed rain water, and long overhangs shade my trunk in the summer but allow the winter sun deep into my interior. My boundary expands south into the yard in the summer when it is warm, and collapses inward in the winter when it is cold. Parts of me peek through the roof envelope so that I have eyes onto the world around me. I am comprised of four living centers that descend down the hill on which I stand, all of them with eyes to the south. The simple sloping roof changes height over the four descending living enabling a unique life energy to emerge at each. Simple is beautiful."#
- Tao Generates Three...#
- "I am oriented to the Sun, and know my place in the Universe. Yin and Yang energies flow though me harmoniously. As I live, I change over time. More efficient appliances reduce the materials crossing my boundaries. Better interior materials improve my indoor air quality. I am sad that I lost three of my Tree People friends on the south side in a winter freeze on my last trip around the sun, but my People have planned to change my eyebrows so that the warming sun is not so bright in the summers to come. I helped raise two young girls into fine young women that now have families and homes of their own. I am watching my People grow old as I too am engaged in my own natural processes or order and disorder. It is good to be alive."#
- ...and Three Generate All Things#
- "My good life is the result of a natural unfolding in creation, from stillness to movement- “Wu-wei” comes to my mind. My living qualities are the result of living patterns that bring life to materials and processes- “Li” is the Taoist term for the patterns that unify and structure our world. I am an expression of the underlying principle of unity and mutual interbeing of the 10,000 things, events and processes. I am Tao of Home."#
- A boy was born the year the Dalles Dam swallowed Celilo Falls on the Columbia. For 10,000 years the People had gathered there every spring; they came from thousands of miles north and south, trading furs, beads and other things for dried salmon. But no more. The falls had fed the People for 10,000 years, but it only took one day for the Dam to swallow the falls.#
- Later, a little man went with his father high up the Wind River. It was Spring. They crawled on their bellies the last few feet and peeked over the edge into a canyon where the Sun did not go. Mighty Salmon People swam below. The Spring Chinook had returned to the gravel homes of their birth and they danced together in the pool of cold clear water. The buck turned sideways, flashing his sides, digging a new home and laying his seed in the gravel. The hen followed gently laying her eggs, and the buck covered them up with his powerful tail. Below them in the soft shallow waters of the tail out, the Salmon People that were finished digging homes for their little ones, were beginning to rot even as their tails still stroked the water they loved. The little man was hooked for life.#
- Later, a young man went with his grandfather to the John Day Dam. It was Summer. Grandfather worked the dam and taught the boy how to hook Salmon People on the rip rap below the dam. They sat in the counting station, watching the mighty ones on their long migration upriver, listening to the clicker as each one was counted, a measure of their slow death over time. At first, the Dams were simply concrete barriers. Realizing their mistake, the planners drew up plans and there was more work to be done building the Fish Ladders. Still, grandfather knew his work killed the very thing he loved. Fish ladders would only slow the slow death. But he needed the work in order to live.#
- Later, a man- now a father himself- walked the Wilson River with fly rod in hand. It was Fall. He was hunting Steelhead People. They followed the Salmon People, and ate any eggs that were loosed from their gravel homes. He knew how to trick the Steelheads with a hook that looked like a Salmon egg. The water had been high and now it was low. The banks were full of rotting Salmon People. Thousands of them. It reeked of rotting flesh. Otherwise washed barren by the floods, the river was thankful for the rotting Salmon People. They were food for the trees that would grow and protect the banks from the floods, and protect the insects that would grow in their shade and feed the little Salmon People next spring.#
- Much later, an old man walked into the grocery store with his Granddaughter. It was Winter. The lights were powered by the dam. The refrigerator where the Salmon People were kept on ice was powered by the dam. He looked at the fish that were raised in a pen, caged in the Ocean. They no longer fed the river, they no longer roamed wild in the Ocean. They were now part of the machine. He looked at the other fish, the ones with a Symbol that told their story- how they were raised in a sustainable fishery way up north, in Alaska. He looked at the price, frowned, and traded paper for the fish with the Sustainable Symbol. Although less of them fed the rivers, at least they still roamed free in the Ocean. It was better than the alternative.#
- A tear filled his eye. Granddaughter asked what was wrong? The Salmon People are leaving us, he said. We will eat this one, and celebrate its life. We will deny the greedy ones that raise the Salmon People in pens. We will celebrate the People that sustain the fishery up North. We will use our paper to change the Circle of Life for the better. #
- Granddaughter asked, why do we eat them? Because we love them and they are part of us, he said. What will we do if all the Salmon People leave us, she asked? We will follow them, he said.#
- Unfolding by Design#
- I have long been a fan of Christopher Alexander who has influenced my design processes in the field of architecture. He also influenced computer science which repurposed his thinking in The Pattern Language into programming concepts. Christopher Alexander proposed that good designs can be measured by the degree of life they contain and he defined this concept and how to measure it. And like nature, that we can create designs that are full of life if we allow them to unfold naturally. He passed away recently, but his thinking is fully developed in his most recent set of four books on The Nature of Order. I propose that outlines structure word chunks in a way that allow us to unfold better writing, maybe even helping to achieve writing that is "full of life?"#
- Process Outlines#
- In the past, I have used a structured methodology by Peter Ingle using outlining to write longer technical articles. The goal, it to spend more time planning what you write, and less time re-writing. It has worked well for me, except I usually jump into word crafting too early, especially for shorter pieces. But on my most recent story, I committed myself to the discipline of unfolding a story in a set of sequential steps. When I did finally jump from outline to prose in my "first" draft if flowed nicely and quickly. I slept on it one night, reread it, and marked it up with surprisingly little red ink. After sleeping on it one more night, I woke and quickly edited it into its final form.#
- Parallel Outlines#
- An important learning lesson was not allowing the outline to evolve and transform into the finished product. Rather, I redid each outline anew as the purpose of the outline changed with each sequential step. This allowed me to expand parallel outline chunks to review previous stages and keep the writing focused and on the task at hand during that stage of the process of unfolding. It also has the benefit of preserving previous ideas that I could return to if/when needed.#
- Outlining for "Life"#
- I wonder if shorter pieces can transform and jump to prose more quickly? It seems to me that Dave has developed great skill at quickly unfolding prose using outlines. I on the other hand have a tendency towards complexity, and benefit from the discipline of outline planning, even on shorter pieces. Longer piece definitely benefit from discipline in planning, and most likely from the process of parallel development. At least that is true for me. On my most recent effort below, I made it 90% of the way before jumping to prose. Still too early. Next time I am going for 95% of the way! I will leave it to you to judge is Starlifter Down has a the quality of “life" within it?#
- Friday, March 21st, 1975#
- Word spreads like fire on an Air Force Base. Doubly true if your father is a flyer. Even faster during war. We knew. I was the oldest, born at Mountain Home A.F.B. Idaho, where dad was flying tankers to refuel bombers and fighter craft in the air. Kevin, was the youngest, born at Kindley A.F.B. Bermuda, where dad was flying rescue missions to recover Gemini astronauts and their space craft. Following the space mission, he was transferred to McChord A.F.B. Washington to learn and fly the C-141 Starlifter to support the war effort in Vietnam. It would become the last base we served on.#
- Kevin recently asked me what I remember about that day. Friday, March 21st, 1975. #
- We were in our tenth year at McChord, a long tour of duty by military standards. My father, Charles F. Hall, had achieved the highest rank an enlisted man can. He was Chief Master Sergeant and the Lead Flight Instructor for the 8th. Military Airlift Command Squadron, responsible for the safety of every crew man in the squadron.#
- By this time, Charlie, as he was called by friend and crew, had over 10,000 hours flying the C-141 Starlifter into airfields in Vietnam. Twice a month he made the long trip from home to the battle zone. The “C” designation means Cargo, and Charlie carried the weapons of war into Vietnam; ammunition and agent orange, helicopters and men. And every trip he brought home the results of war, coffins with boys in them. Boys just barely older than me. #
- I was proud of my dad, as any boy would be. He stayed up late most nights at home, studying his manuals. As a flight engineer, he was responsible for the power plant- four Pratt and Whitney jet engines. As he put it, it was his job to get the plane up in the air and keep it there. The only thing the pilots did was point it in a direction! Dad had lots of stories, and we loved hearing them all. We had our own stories too. Growing up, it was not uncommon to have friends just disappear from school- because their fathers did not return home from a trip. I still remember a prior day in Bermuda, when an Air Force and Navy plane collided while dropping frogmen into the water on a practice run. The sharks were in the water, and kids disappeared from school the next day. #
- On that day, Friday, March 21st, 1975, we were expecting him home from Vietnam. I was in my Senior year at High School in my first class of the day. Word spread like wildfire visibly disrupting the entire school of over 1500 students- a Starlifter was down, somewhere in the Olympic Peninsula. Not far from home, the Olympics are like a huge fortress of mountains that stand guard over the Puget Sound, sheltering it from the violent storm of the Pacific Ocean. The Olympics are the last hurdle to clear in the long haul from Vietnam to McChord Air Force Base. On that day- a Starlifter was down, in the Olympics.#
- Mom#
- I heard the word and rushed for the phone to call home. Already kids were lined up to call home. When it was my turn, I dialed my dear sweet mom and will never forget that call. She picked up. “Mom?” “Kenny?” Her breathing was shallow and fast, deep panic in every breath. She feared I was the base commander calling to give her the most terrible news possible. But no, there was no official word yet, and she was enduring the worst fear possible not knowing.#
- Feeling the pain of my mother, I stuck another quarter in the phone and dialed the operator. Connect me to the Base Commander I instructed. No please in my voice, no hint of a request, just a military order on the phone. No one on a military base wants to talk to the base commander. And for someone my age, especially me- it usually means you are in big trouble. But the old man picked up the phone. He was calming. Yes, my father was listed on the manifest for that flight, but no, they did not have final word and were waiting for more details. He would call my mother as soon as he knew more. I hung up and ran to my car.#
- Between school and home was a lake with a bridge across it. The nice houses along the lake were hidden from view by hedges that grew into a narrow lane with lots of blind curves leading up to the bridge. It was my Le Mans, and the gearbox on my Volkswagon screamed as I hit second gear on my favorite curve, drifting across the line to straighten out the road. Emerging from the lakeside trees, I crossed that bridge like a bullet fired from a gun. #
- Less than 15 minutes after leaving school, I was home- and mom had just hung up the phone with the base commander. He had called to personally give her the news after confirmation. Although listed on the flight manifest, my dad had been pulled off the flight in Yakota, Japan, where they stopped for refueling. It turns out, the Starlifter had suffered a sudden depressurization event in flight out of Vietnam, probably from gunfire- and unknown to my dad, flawed dental work had left an air pocket in a tooth which erupted in violent pain during the depressurization event. Another crewman had replaced Charlie on that flight home.#
- Duty#
- No sooner had dad returned on the very next flight- but he turned around and left. As the flight instructor, it was now his job to join the Search and Rescue crew to look for survivors, inspect the crash site and file the accident report. It was a grim task. He knew every crewman on that flight- they were close friends. And it was a tough task. From the flight path they knew about where the plane must be, on Mt. Constance- the third highest peak in the Olympic Mountain range- and possibly the toughest.#
- Mt. Constance is on the Eastern side of the range, the last peak to get across when descending into McChord airfield from the Pacific. It rises from the Hood Canal at sea level up to 7,743 feet. Easy to spot from Seattle, it is the highest visible jagged peak. A rain forest enshrouds the base, rock and glacier are exposed at the peak. It is a tough climb on a good day, but a miserable climb when you are looking for your friends at a crash site.#
- My dad told me what they found up there, and I will not repeat the details out of respect. It is enough to know that the crew of 10 airmen and six passengers that were “jumping” home all died instantly. They never knew what hit them. They flew straight into the top of Mt. Constance at 600 miles per hour while in descent. It was early morning, still in the dark. They had a moment of surprise and confusion when the crash alarm went off, and then nothing. They hit the rocky ridge a mere 150 feet below the top. If they had begun their descent into McChord air field 30 seconds later, they would have missed the mountain and had a story to tell.#
- Sixteen souls were lifted into the deep blue yonder that day- and flags were lowered to half mast on base. We soon learned the events leading up to the crash were all avoidable- as is almost always the case. An Air Traffic Controller operating out of the Seattle Tacoma international airport had mistaken the C-141 Starlifter for a different plane, a Navy Grumman A-6 Intruder, and authorized the descent below 10,000 feet. My dads assessment however was that it was the crews fault. They knew better and were instructed to double check before beginning descent over the Olympic Mountain range. Charlie had flown that descent a couple hundred times. He speculated what they were doing. They were tired from too many hours of flying. They were likely disobeying orders and filling out their paperwork in flight- because when they landed, they wanted to go straight home and crawl into their own beds. Close to home, they felt safe- and their minds were tricked into complacency.#
- Honor#
- Years later, my mom shared with me how depressed my father was becoming those last few years flying in and out of Vietnam. He was sick and tired of bringing home caskets with boys in them. In those days, every casket was draped in a flag and reported by the media. And I was getting to the age where I could have been drafted myself.#
- That is most likely why dad invited me to attend the military funeral with him honoring the dead at the McChord Theatre. The week before, I had watched a Saturday matinee, and now I was among men dressed in full military uniform, medals of honor pinned to their chest, and Taps being played by a military dress band. It was a deeply moving ceremony that gave meaning to the lives of those men. It made my heart swell with sadness, and the pride of patriotism that gives strength to men risking their lives. After the soulful prayers and stirring music were concluded, we adjourned outside for a volley of rifle fire for each man, and fighter jets flew overhead in “missing man” formation.#
- We learned later that the Air Traffic Controller blamed himself for the accident and took his own life- so now their were seventeen souls that died when that Starlifter went down. And that was another tragic mistake. Who is to say the accident was his fault? I wish now I had asked my dad when I could. Maybe it was the fault of the dentist? Maybe had his work not been shoddy, my father would have been on that plane. Maybe he would have prevented the accident. He had done so before. And maybe he too would have been filling out paperwork. Maybe.#
- Survival#
- What I have learned since then, is that it is not enough to be prepared. And it is not enough to be lucky. You have to also carry foremost in your mind -all the time- that you are human, and subject to a set of traps that evolution has bred into our biology. Those men flying that Starlifter were tired, and they had their sights set on home. Having your sights set on safety can literally blind you. And that is just one of the many traps of biology we now understand much better.#
- If you, or someone you know engages in any kind of risky behavior like rock climbing, or whitewater rafting, or just driving a car down the freeway late at night- I strongly suggest reading Deep Survival: Who Live, Who Dies, and Why? Written by Lawrence Gonzales, it begins with a story of his father surviving a downed flight in WWII, and tells many other stories in the context of what we are learning about ourselves as biological beings revealed by new discoveries in cognitive science. It is required reading for the friends that join me in our outdoor adventures, so that we keep a good eye on each other! #
- Another lesson learned for those who survive an accident, or anyone looking back on a set of circumstances and wondering how and why they worked out the way they did, don’t! Never look back, never second guess yourself. Do not judge yourself or others! This world is too complex for human beings to disentangle with our minds. When you are tempted to do so, remember this Chinese parable as told by the late Zen teacher, Alan Watts- and stop that thought before it even gets started!#
- Once upon a time there was a Chinese farmer whose horse ran away. That evening, all his neighbors came around to commiserate. They said, “We are so sorry to hear your horse has run away. This is most unfortunate.” The farmer said, “Maybe.” The next day the horse came back bringing seven wild horses with it, and in the evening everybody came back and said, “Oh, isn’t that lucky. What a great turn of events. You now have eight horses!” The farmer again said, “Maybe.”#
- The following day his son tried to break one of the horses, and while riding it, he was thrown and broke his leg. The neighbors then said, “Oh dear, that’s too bad,” and the farmer responded, “Maybe.” The next day the conscription officers came around to conscript people into the army, and they rejected his son because he had a broken leg. Again all the neighbors came around and said, “Isn’t that great!” Again, he said, “Maybe”#
- Having taken the time to compose and post a longer piece using Drummer (my first) about People of Canyon De Chelly (immediately below) I record here a few Lessons Learned:#
- It took a little restructuring of the outline to get the feel of a coherent piece with HTML tags to achieve bold headers. Now I know.#
- I erred in my assumptions about how the "#" links work, thinking I could link to specific subsections. Rather they position position the particular outline item (a paragraph in this case) at the top of the page, but the full article (one day) is fully rendered. (Example.)#
- It was easiest to include images as "inlineImage" header attributes for an outline item with a caption. This worked very well. Previously, I have had to put in quite a bit of time attempting to compose images within the flow of text using HTML tags. This can be a little tedious. (Example.)#
- Also, Ken Smith's posting about longer articles reminded me of a structured writing method i used to use that worked very well for longer technical articles. I plan to redeploy this method on my next effort, likely using both an OPML file written to disk (and a Pages document) before including it in a daily post.#
- I am using Pages for longer pieces because I benefit from getting away from the piece for a few days, printing it out, scratching it up with a pen- and then massivly redoing it as my thinking/emotions evolve. I find it to be very different than a shorter post. #
- My coding experience is very limited, but I may yet need to dig into scripting as i would like to know how to gather up various sections of outlines and string them together into an even longer post. Maybe this is naive. Any suggestions/tips about what I am missing are welcome.#
- HTH. It is challenging to write clearly about the particulars of using software. Cheers.#
- In Search of Shadow and Spirit#
- We are a modern day shadow catcher and wagon master. Mary Ann with her digital camera and lenses, and I with our 400 horse F-150 and 19’ trailer. Together, we have been thankful for the opportunity to travel the west and experience her landscapes and people. On this particular adventure we had a mission, to return to Canyon de Chelly and hire a native Dineh guide- referred to by our culture as Navajo- to take us into that beautiful enchanted canyon that has been home to so many different native people. And we had a few delightful surprises along the way.#
- Driving is good for the soul- it gives you time to think deeply and bring to the surface what the modern world tends to cover up. On this drive I was thinking about our relationship with each other, as people- person-to-person. We are social creatures, evolved to live in community, and our brains are wired to help us, although in todays world that wiring can also hurt us. Our relationship with the First Peoples is, well, conflicted to say the least. Tangled up in that messy ball are the mythic portrayals of the American West, ideas about what is savage and noble, conflicting versions of nature and god, and of course ownership of land and access to natural resources. #
- Thinking on these things, I listened to the emotions stirring in my body. I could feel a sense of embarrassment and shame for the pain of so many conquerers over the ages. A degree of grief and sadness in the loss of loved ones in fights to defend ways of living and land. Some remorse and empathy as I considered how wealth is accrued, or not- depending on where you are born, and to whom. But as I was beginning to dwell on equanimity, my attention was snapped to full alert as we climbed a hill and the snowflakes began to fall.#
- I feared the remaining one hour drive to the canyon would become a full day ordeal. As we neared the pass, the snow became a howling blizzard with wipers struggling to keep the windows clear. This is not good when towing a trailer and I kept it slow. But as we descended into the final valley and searched for our campground, the snow diminished and the clouds began to part revealing the beauty of bare cottonwood trees enshrouded in snow with the rays of a setting sun alight on their frozen limbs. We had arrived, and we were excited.#
- Canyon De Chelly and Canyon Del Muerto#
- We awoke early to a bluebird day full of promise. Freezing cold and crystal clear. the soft glow of the sun was just peaking over the hills. Only one other camper braved the elements to join us at Cottonwood Campground right next to the canyon. Perfect.#
- The first westerners to come upon the canyon and it inhabitants were the Spanish. Later when Americans tried to read the written Spanish name, Canyon De “Tseyi” became De “Chelly,”pronounced today as Canyon De “Shay.” Like branches of a tree, there are actually two main canyons, the second being Canyon Del Muerto- which means dead in Spanish (and indeed many Spanish were killed there at Massacre Cave when they climbed the cliff walls to attack the inhabitants.)#
- There is no hint of the canyons from a distance. They are like a crack in the earth you come upon suddenly and peer over the edge. Deep time and geological forces formed this landscape; crashing tectonic plates deep underground lifted the land, while torrential rain fall carried away the softer earth materials to expose red cliffs worn smooth by wind and textured by the swirl of vortices. Topophilia is a strange word that comes to mind, it means love of landscape. This is a place that is easy to love. It takes your breath away when you gaze upon it and marvel at creation, the ever-changing patterns of beauty tickle your minds eye. #
- The place where the two canyons join together into the mainstream of Canyon De Chelly is logically named Junction, and that is where we experienced our first magical surprise of the day. Junction is a fairly smooth rocky plateau overlooking the canyon, and the ages have weathered small shallow bowls in the landscape which were filled with frozen water. Perfect for photography in this weather, and Mary Ann was off to capture reflections of canyon walls and clouds floating in the deep blue sky. And then it happened…#
- Dineh Spirits Embrace Us#
- Alone, not a tourist about, all of a sudden Mary Ann was surrounded by curious, suspicious dogs. Half a dozen at least, and she shot me that look that says “get over here now!” I delayed just long enough to secure Priya in the truck and began rushing across the frozen rocky plateau when we both saw a herd of sheep emerge from the brush, followed by their Dineh shepherd. He indicated they were good dogs and we both relaxed. Mary Ann set about capturing the moment with sheep, dogs and frozen pools of water. And I walked over to the shepherd.#
- Here was an old man, moving slowly. His face weathered dark, cracked and red, just like the canyon. As I approached we both smiled and I saw he had but few teeth. And as he smiled he pulled out a rock from his pocket and asked if I wanted to buy it? He told me he had painted it and it was the only one he had on him. How much, $20. Sure I said and dug through my wallet. He turned the rock over and showed me his signature, Clarence Dawes.#
- We spoke for awhile and I heard his story. The sheep were there for the water, busting through the iced pools to get a drink wherever possible. This is dry country and the locals know how to take advantage of every bit of water. Clarence told me his grandfather was a soldier in WWII. Not a code talker, but a fighter. I asked if he was Dineh, and he told me he was Blackfeet and Dineh. I know the Blackfeet were fierce warriors and he smiled when I told him so. He had married into the Dawes family and taken the name of his Dineh wife, as is the way with matriarchal cultures. We spoke slowly, sharing a little time together- but the sheep were moving on, so after posing for a photograph, Clarence and I shook hands and said good bye. The last I saw of him, he was getting out of the wind behind a brush, lighting a smoke.#
- We were excited to have had such a unique opportunity- snow and ice, rock and canyon, Dineh sheep and shepherd, all under a blue sky. So we resumed our adventure, heading off to the next spot along the rim overlooking the canyon. Here we found our first couple of tourist, who were ignoring the van was backed in with its rear door open. I could see a Dineh rug hangin out the back, and a young energetic Dineh man emerged and soon engaged Mary Ann in conversation. Again she shot me that look, this one signaling I needed to extract her from this tourist trap! Naturally, I went over to join in the conversation and realized immediately I was dealing with a talented charismatic salesman! He had three painting to show us in the back of the van as he proceeded to draw us into his story.#
- Growing up a shy young Dineh hiding behind his mother, he told us how he had come out of his shell by relearning the ancient ways from his elders and how to interpret the meaning of their art. He explained the symbols on his painting and told us we could find him on Google and Youtube where he tells his story and explains the symbols in more detail. Of course I was going to buy a painting from him- he was a hoot and we hit it off. Out came my wallet again, but I was running low on cash, and asked Mary Ann what she had? I explained I had spent a little money up the road with a Shepherd at Junction and he asked if it was Clarence. Yes it was, and he told me Clarence was his grandfather! Canyon De Chelly was a big place he said, but everyone in it is connected. When he offered to pose for the photograph, I retrieved Clarence’s rock from the truck for him to hold with his own painting. He made sure we knew how to spell his name so we could look him up on the internet, then we said shook hands goodbye. Antonio Carroll - with two R’s and two L’s.#
- Now we had met grandfather and grandson and were happy to talk with them. Mary Ann had captured their shadows, and I have their paintings in my studio. I reflected on my own Grandfather, Leo “Clarence” Beckwith. Leo was a country man. Of the many gifts he gave me, one was knowing how to meet people- anyone, and talk with them out of respect, and how to shake their hand.#
- Shadows Cast Light in the Dark#
- Another bluebird morning followed with air fresh and crisp. Our breath was visible as we walked to our meeting spot with our native guide. Awaiting us were a classic red 4WD jeep and Benjamin Anagal of Beauty Way Tours. He was about my age, but much larger and looked older, his face was round, with a large nose and gentle eyes. I noticed he had no ear lobes, rather a large fold of skin that stretched from his ear half way down his neck- all of it beaten by years in wind and sun. Benjamin filled the Jeep- his large belly pressing against the round steering wheel held him firmly in place as we bounced down the tire rutted stream bed. I liked Benjamin from the first moment we spoke on the phone, and grew to like him even more during the several hours we spent together as he guided us through the riverbed of Canyon de Chelly.#
- Benjamin grew up in the canyon, his family has property at Junction, where Canyon de Merde meets Canyon de Chelly (at the same place we had met Antonio up above on the rim the day before.) His Aunt lives there now- the only person that lives in the canyon year around- not just battling the winter, but also protecting her sheep from Mountain Lions and Black Bear. Benjamin showed us where he grew up, beneath ancient ruins of the Anasazi people, the settlements where they lived and left their marks. He described how his family moved around, shifting their livestock from the mountains in the fall and back into the canyon in the spring. His first language was Dineh, and we learned he too had been taken off the reservation to attend boarding school where he was forced to give up his ways and adopt English.#
- I speculate that Benjamin has been relatively successful by Dineh standards. He has been guiding since 1989, first part time while working other jobs, and full time for the last two decades. The pandemic hit the reservation hard, not just economically, but in the loss of friends and family. He told me he now has a Hogan (house) about 8 miles above the canyon where he keeps horses. He rents the horses out to other Dineh that use them to round up cattle or guide tourists like myself into the canyon.#
- Benjamin spoke slowly, and poetically. He was respectful when speaking of the scientific knowledge of experts like geologist and anthropologist, and reverential when sharing the spiritual knowledge passed to him by his ancestors. As he showed us the pictographs and petroglyphs that adorned the canyon walls, he explained the difference and what they meant to the the people that had left their marks. He spoke of a complex web of life that have been evolving in the canyon since the age of the Pyramids, and continues to this day.#
- We learned how deer were run down, exhausted and trapped in box canyons, to be killed by covering their mouth and suffocating them by hand. That was the way if they were to be used in sacred rituals, otherwise spears, arrows and later guns were used, if for meat. We learned that Massacre cave is so named for the brutal slaughter of women and children by the Spanish Conquistators while the men were away on a hunting trip, but also how the brave Dineh woman had fought the Spanish in hand to hand combat, dragging them off the cliff to fall nearly a thousand feed to their death in suicidal combat to protect their children. We learned the legend of Spider Rock, and the Spider Woman who lived there and punished misbehaving children by carrying them to the top and spinning her web to entrap them. And we learned of how Kit Carson and the army attacked the Dineh destroying their crops and killing all livestock to starve them out of the canyons and force them on the Long Walk to reservations.#
- We also learned that these struggles continue today. The Dineh are but the most recent people to occupy Canyon De Chelly. Before them, the Hopi had lived there- but the Dineh drove them off and took the land for themselves. We were told that even today the conflict between Hopi and Dineh over land continues- as it has between “us and them” since the white man appeared on this continent. And the struggle continues in the landscape itself, with battles against invasive species such as Russian Olive trees which were brought in for flood control, but have grown like weeds. And the challenges of an ever-changing river bottom from the summer monsoons which flood the canyons.#
- Our time with Benjamin was short. And while there were great photo opportunities, we really treasured the stories he imparted to us and his manner doing so. Canyon De Chelly and Del Mureto are much more meaningful places to us now. Leaving the landscape and few Dineh that we have met for such a brief time leaves me with a sense of our impermanence. Perhaps I should quit thinking of these people as “the first people” and we as the ones that colonized them and put them on to reservations- although that is true. While here I have been empathetic to the economic challenges of building wealth in a remote place like this, where jobs are few and the land values don’t rise because it is a reservation and the canyon itself is federally protected property. It is difficult to “get ahead” here.#
- But who am I to judge the lives of these people. Thinking of all the crazy things going on in our world, there is a good chance they will survive deeper into the future. They have been toughened to adapt their ways to a changing world, and live in this unforgiving landscape. When all that we have, melts into air, perhaps they will still be here? But I am also left with a strengthening of the sense that regardless of our governments, and the competition between men, we are all “the people.” I continue in my own beliefs that we are all embedded within a beautiful biosphere, living on earth and sharing a common story of creation. I am happy to carry away a simple rock painting, a small canvas painting, and some wonderful photographs by Mary Ann. But most of all, a few memories of some interesting people- people that ultimately are no different than me- each unique and beautiful in their own way. As I drive away, the emotion of equanimity grows slowly stronger, because we showed them the respect they deserve.#
A good day to continue this float down Life's Rivers. My journey down river with Drummer has led me into the Twitter steam. Fun and adventure await around every bend in the river... :)#
- Dave- I am glad you are in this world writing Scripting News and creating Drummer.#
- A long time reader of Scripting News, I fell away from it during the peak of my career when my focus shifted, and returned more recently. To my delight I learned you had created Drummer and dove right in. It was easy to install, although I have avoided Twitter so that part was a mystery to me. So far I have not explored the relationship between Drummer and Twitter.#
- I read constantly and have long harbored a dream of writing- and you gave me the ideal platform to kick start that effort. Thank you very much. My purpose is simple. I am writing primarily for my grandchildren, and secondarily for a few friends. I have no need or desire to create a brand or build a community. Like you I am crafting words these days primarily for myself. The only way people read my writing is if I send them an email with a link. I am thankful for the occasional feedback a few friends send my way.#
- You asked for feedback, and I have not provided any because Drummer is Free! You seem busy to me and I don’t feel I have a right to ask for features or complain. And I am gun shy about asking questions for fear of having missed something in the Docs. Frankly, I would rather pay for Drummer, because then I would have more confidence the product would be around for awhile. I hope you never pull the plug (and make arrangements for your servers to continue beyond you! :)#
- I plan to get into Dakota (and AWS and PagePark) at some point, but right now I am putting my creative energy into songwriting and guitar. I have discovered some really great music software and am having a blast expanding my knowledge of music theory and technical chops. I never realized songwriting could be so fun and it has become very complimentary to my writing effort. They are beginning to feed on each other.#
- As for tree charts, I don’t need them in retirement and if I did I would create them myself using design software. As you know, Architects are very finicky about little things like line weights, font control, subtle colors, the exact right kind of arrows etc. Also, over the years I have transitioned away from tree charts to complex systems diagrams where relationships between objects are equally important and ideas cannot be expressed in hierarchy.#
- There are capabilities in drummer I would like to see, but again I am hesitate to say so. I would like to compose images more easily, arrange short stories into larger multiple interlinked themes, and I would like to create a portfolio of my work, and be able to publish my songs. These are big asks and they are not in tune with your efforts. So I will happily make do with Drummer as is and accept whatever you do. Plus, as I have said before- now I have the capabilities of a great outliner in my hands. Thank you very much!#
- Ken#
- PS- Thanks for the recent tip about bookmarks!#
- Can Humanity Change? The jury is still out on that one. Can you and I change? Yes absolutely. I for example have turned over so many new leaves in my life- I tell my wife I am a now a whole new tree! And still I have lots of room for improvement- and whole new branches yet to grow.#
- We are currently on a road trip, and that means I need a good book for those moments when Mary Ann has hopped out of the truck to take a picture (sometimes before I even stop rolling!) So when I found a book claiming we can “Architect our Character” and that “Psychitecture can take a mind that is like a prison and gradually transform it into a Palace” I was hooked. #
- Designing The Mind | The Principles of Psychitecture is one of those books that I have savored; soaking it up, and absorbing it bit-by-bit. Perfect for a road trip when you have lots of time to mull things over, pondering new insights and considering how they fit into your life. This is one of those books I wish I had read when young, and now want to send a copy to all my friends! #
- Filled with references to classical Stoicism, Buddhism and western inquiries into the nature of mind, author Ryan Bush- a systems designer and thinker- synthesizes ancient knowledge with modern cognitive science and leverages the analogy of algorithms from computer science to explain how we can literally reprogram the code running in our minds.#
- When we understand the mind as a biological “machine” that has millions of years of “code” embedded in- and the interaction of sub-systems that make up the whole- we can consciously and objectively “step through” that code to observe how it works. And with a little (or in some cases a lot) of effort, we can “reprogram” the automatic “chain of algorithms” to bring forth alternative behaviors of our own design. That is a powerful idea! #
- Mary Ann and I will soon begin our trip home, and I have been saving the final few chapters for our return trip. Already, I have managed to “reprogram” a couple of behaviors that have left me smiling. In one case I was able to short circuit a situation that previously would have raised my ire. In another, I withheld judgement and saved a friendship- no small matter in todays world where we are increasingly polarized by the news!#
- If you are like me, and feel you can benefit from turning over a few new leafs, check this book out! You can learn more from a free PDF download from the Designing The Mind website. The author also sends out emails occasionally that are worth signing up for.#
- Let me know what you think, and have fun drifting down Life’s Rivers!#
- A lifelong dream realized- and having more fun than i could have imagined! This morning, I said "good enough" and published my first song to the Internet. GarageBand has a built in link to SoundCloud, so I gave it a go- check out Tiamat on SoundCloud. It is free, and you don't need an account. Please let me know if it works, and if you enjoy it?#
- This is my first time using HookPad and GarageBand to create a song. My first time recording vocals and mixing. My first time attempting to master and publish a song. Like any endeavor worth pursuing, I have mostly learned how much I have yet to learn. And could benefit from some voice lessons!#
- Next step will be recording this again with guitar- that will force discipline and technique into my guitar playing. I think I will practice around the campfire on our upcoming trip for awhile... Cheers.#
- First Feedback#
- "Well Ken, there are a few sour notes in there..." HaHa- so true! Did I mention voice lessons? :) #
- And a request for the Lyrics:#
- Every River And #
- Every Star And#
- Every Animal Is Singing#
- Song and a Prayer#
- Every Person And#
- Every Wave And#
- Every Particle Is Loving#
- Time and this Feeling #
- #
- Flaring Forth from Tiamat#
- One Story for Mankind#
- Born from Galactic Star Dust#
- Living and Building Day Time#
- Bathed in Beautiful Star Light#
- Loving and Dreaming Night Time#
- We are Children of the Universe#
- Awake in Space and Time#
- #
- Every Flower And#
- Every Moon And#
- Every Covenant Is Binding#
- All of us Together#
- Every Mother And#
- Every Child And#
- Every One of Us Is a Gift#
- From TiaMat#
- #
- Flaring Forth from Tiamat#
- One Story for Womankind#
- Born from Galactic Star Dust#
- Living and Healing Day Time#
- Bathed in Beautiful Star Light#
- Loving and Dreaming Night Time#
- We are Children of the Universe#
- Awake on Earth in Love#
- A little backstory on Tiamat, and the source of my inspiration...#
- As old friend recently reminded me, back in the day “pulling an all nighter” meant you had stayed up all night in some Herculean effort like preparing for an exam or finishing a design project. Today, pulling an all nighter is the Herculean effort of sleeping all night!#
- When we are young, deep sleep and dream time come easily. A hard day of play leads to deep sleep and vivid dreams, while growing muscles and neurons. It turns out that as we age, the peaceful sleep of youth is more difficult. And the modern world has brought us additional challenges with artificial light, highly competitive work stressors, driving commutes, flights across time zones, digital screen time, and best of all- high quality caffeine! #
- But we males have one additional and wholly natural curse that impacts our sleep as we age. After an initial growth spurt in puberty, we have an otherwise wonderful sexual organ that takes a short break, and then it resumes growing again in midlife. I am talking about our Prostrate! Hell, I didn’t even know if was there until the Doctor started poking around to see how large it was!#
- The prostate can cause lots of problems for men- Cancer among them. But for most men, myself included, the growing prostate puts pressure on the bladder- which causes frequent urination, especially at night- wrecking blissful sleep and dream time. As a consequence of this malady, I have been researching prostate and bladder health. (See references below.) But what has interested me the most is sleep itself- what is it, why do we do it, and how can I get better at what used to come so naturally?#
- Why We Sleep#
- Why We Sleep is an excellent book by sleep researcher Matthew Walker, PhD. It turns out that Sleep is likely our natural primordial state, and wakefulness is an adventure into daylight from which we retreat on a daily basis to heal ourselves and prepare for the next day. From our lives in the womb until old age, our sleep evolves and changes as we grow older. And the rhythm of sleep itself has changed as homo sapiens evolved into the social animals that currently rule over planet Earth- all made possible by sleep.#
- Broadly speaking, we have two basic types of sleep; REM sleep (Rapid Eye Movement) is when we are dreaming, and NREM sleep (Non-Rapid Eye Movement) is when we are “healing.” It is more complicated than this (as I show below) but for simplicity, I will refer to them as Dream Sleep and Healing Sleep.#
- Healing Sleep is made up of a couple of phases we pass through from Light Sleep to Deep Sleep and back again. Thought of musically, light sleep is chaotic while in deep sleep a brain rhythm can be actually be “heard” that signals the work of healing and growth. It is during deep sleep that we cement our daily experience into long-term memories and grow new neural connections. Healing sleep also “processes” our daily experience with our fellow primates, critically examining social relationships, especially facial and bodily gestures to deepen our survival skills by better perceiving our social space.#
- Dream Sleep also serves specific functions. During dream sleep, the voluntary control of our muscles is “turned off” along with the cognitive functions of our “higher” brain. Dream sleep turns a spotlight on our emotional life, with the evolutionary advantage of dampening sour memories of bad emotional experiences.#
- But what was most fascinating to me about Dr. Walker’s book, was the other functions of dream sleep- problem solving and creativity! Thanks to the magic of Magnetic Resonance Imaging (MRI) researchers like Dr. Walker have spent the last 20 years creating scientific experiments in sleeping laps and actually observing the specific activities that occur within the brain of sleeping sapiens. We now know that while the dreams we remember upon waking may not make sense to us logically, they are in fact a larger picture of the web of our lives and facilitate solving complex messy problems and creating wholly new works of art.#
- Especially interesting to me, is the fact of lucid dreaming, where the sleeper is conscious, and to some degree, n control of the content of their dreams. Ironically, having read about this last night before sleep, I had the experience of lucid dreaming early this morning. But I will be dammed if my logical brain can figure out what it all means at this point!#
- These are simply some of the take aways from Why We Sleep. There is so much more here; about the problems with sleeping pills and alcohol, the dangers of lack of sleep, and solid advice on how to get better sleep. I recommend this book if any of this has sparked your imagination or curiosity.#
- Links to a few books I found helpful:#
- Why We Sleep | Unlocking the Power of Sleep and Dreams by Steven Walker, PhD#
- Sleep Interrupted by Steven Y. Park, M.D.#
- Healing the Prostate by Dr. Mark Stengler#
- Wearable Tech#
- In my effort to improve my sleep, I needed better information about how I was actually sleeping, and a method to test our the result of various efforts to improve my sleep. Consequently, since I needed a new wedding ring, I decided to invest in an Oura Ring which I now wear on my ring finger.#
- The Oura Ring is my first foray into Wearable Tech. Every morning when I get up now, the first thing I do is launch the Oura app on my iPhone. My ring and phone talk to each other for a minute and presto, I have a full report on what actually occurred during my sleep along with a wide variety of other data about my health that is monitored throughout the day. Soon, they will even be reporting oxygen levels- which means of course an upgrade from V3 to V4!#
- Much like how we are unable to remember most of our dreams, our knowledge of our sleep is actually much fuzzier than we might think. And of course, alarm clocks, caffeine, sugar and artificial lights actually help to mask our knowledge and understanding of our sleep. I confess to being wary of the impacts of technology, but at the same time I have benefited from this particular technology by measuring and better understanding my sleep, which has been slowly improving over the last several months.#
- The Pacific Northwest gray rainy days are getting old- time to head south for a little warmth and sun! Our destination is Colorado, where Aletheia awaits us- except now she is a walking (almost talking) little Homo Sapien! Can't wait to hold her in my arms again! And of course being with Shannon, and playing guitar with my son-in-law Mike! The return trip is wide open. Life is good.#
- All Sapiens Design. It is part of what makes us Human- to have some idea in mind of a future outcome, and then set upon a course to make it so. As a professional Architect, I had the great fortune of three years in Architecture School where we studied the Architecture gods like Frank Loyd Wright and worshipped at the altar of Design Process. And I was then lucky enough to earn a livelihood and practice this art as a professional being paid by clients to deliver ideas that could be built, or sold to their clients.#
- Today I am realizing a long held dream of designing my own music, and am struck by the universality of the design process I studied to become a professional designer. Looking back, it is really a simple process. Beginning with a concept, one travels a paths from very loose general ideas to increasingly more specific ideas that are tested against the original concept. Then adjustments are made, sometimes starting over and traveling a different path. Rinse and repeat until you find yourself with a "solution" that is “good enough.” The hardest part is to just start down a path without assurance that it will lead you to want to go, but having the confidence in yourself to know that you will get there, eventually. What architecture school adds to this universal human process is the various tools of the craft that are unique to architecture; likewise computer science, engineering and all the other design arts.#
- These days, I am studying music theory and the various music gods I have enjoyed over the years along with the tools of the music craft. Much has changed since I learned the art of architecture. Back then we did everything by hand, and of course today- very little is done by hand. I am benefitting by access to great music software at little or no cost such as HookPad and GarageBand respectively. But thankfully, there is still a place for human craft in music and I am finding that the biggest limitations (and perhaps strengths) are my voice and guitar.#
- I have been working on my first song on and off for about two months now- and having a blast. Like my first projects in architecture school, it is very sophomoric and has a lot of room for improvement. But it is uniquely mine, and the simple act of designing/writing music is making me a better musician, just as the act of designing/drawing architecture makes one a better architect; by integrating theory and craft into real world results and learning from them.#
- In architecture, we have many options to integrate the basic systems of envelope, structure, interiors and services (mechanical, electrical, plumbing etc.) In music, we have a dizzying array of options with lyrics, melody, harmony and rhythm. Where does one begin? The answer for me is everywhere all at once! Nothing is precedent and everything has to be solved together- that is what makes design so challenging, and so much fun! #
- The last two months of trial and error have taught me a lot. Software tools have enabled me to learn and try out music theory ideas that are finally taking root in my brain. My first song has evolved from just hunting for chords that seem to work, into specific keys and an order of chords with a concept in mind. At first in G Major, but then shifting to C Major for the Chorus and its relative minor for the Verses. Three months ago I had no idea why I might want to do so. (Now I am puzzling how to transition between the verse and the chorus.)#
- Interesting to me also is the relationship between what can be accomplished digitally, versus the human body. I learned that using Hookpad and GarageBand I could come up with something that was fairly interesting musically, but very difficult to sing with my voice, or play on my guitar. That in turn provides real world constraints (as in architecture) that inform the evolution of the music, making it better and something that can be performed live, with an audience as the final judge- just as in architecture, when humans finally walk inside and experience the space you have created.#
- As with any design process, you go back and forth, refining and testing ideas. The trick is knowing how to guide this process, to let it unfold in an order that results in something that is full of “life.” This is exactly what the theorist Christopher Alexander was writing and thinking about in “The Order of Nature.” And the results are all around us in the great works of Architecture and Music (and the other design Arts…)#
- While my first song is still evolving, I am already dreaming about my next song… and thinking it will be much moodier, about one of my best friends that died in a whirlpool on a river- written in the Key of G, using the Phrygian mode, searching for the Spanish Gypsy / Spaghetti Western sound. #
- I feel like a child beginning Kindergarten all over again… :) #
- I knew it at the time, but it took many years to understand why. Having learned taiji (aka Tai Chi- "supreme ultimate") from Paul Pitchford, I was never able to find another teacher the equal of him. And that is saying something since I subsequently studied taiji for seven years with a grandmaster living in Portland that is famous throughout China. (But that is another story.)#
- Paul is best known as the author of the classic book, Healing with Whole Foods | Asian Traditions and Modern Nutrition. I met Paul years before he wrote his classic, when he was teaching taiji in Moscow Idaho, and leading healing retreats in the mountains of Northern Idaho. I would make the short drive from Pullman Washington (where I was studying Architecture) to Moscow every Tuesday and Thursday evening for a class with Paul. #
- Like many people my age, I was introduced to martial arts by the TV show Kung Fu starring David Carradine. A trip to the library led me to a little book about taiji, from which I learned the simple exercise of "walking on rice paper." Years later when a college roomate said someone was teaching taiji in Moscow, I jumped on the opportunity- and was not dissapointed. #
- Paul was a western Caucasian, but he learned and taught in the tradition of Taoism. He was not only skilled at taijichuan, but also a practitioner of eastern medicine; blending Chinese 5 element theory with Japanese shiatsu while reading our pulse and teaching us about the macrobiotic diet. More importantly, in addition to the long and short solo forms of traditional Yang style taiji, we also taijichuan (aka Tai Chi Chuan, or “supreme ultimate boxing”) by practicing the two person training forms of push hands and sanshou. Paul taught the martial taoist first principle of selfdefense- which is a responsibility to teach and heal your duaifang (aka your "opposite" in battle, better thought of as your partner, rather than your opponent.)#
- Now 44 years after first learning from Paul, my practice of taiji is still inspired by him. As I learned from John Denver's bodyguard, taijichuan is truly the best martial art for older peolple. It remains and excels as a functional martial art as we age, and is a tremendous means to extend vitality into old age, as taught by the imortal Taoist masters of Ancient China. Tai Chi as it is taught today, has largely become a Performing Art- not a martial art. I was lucky to learn taijichuan as a Taoist martial art, and owe it all to Paul Pitchford.#
- Spoiler alert- Don't Look Up is too realistic for comfort! This movie is the perfect analogy for our times, and we have every reason to believe the movie's ending is the only ending possible for our species. For the ending of this movie is a beautiful teaching- gather together with the ones you love, share your last meal; and accept fate with grace and equanimity.#
- It give me great sadness to say these things, for I so deeply love my children and grandchildren and wish for them a long life, prosperity, and all the pleasures of Mother Earth. Sadly, that will not be the case. I fear the best we can do is prepare them to be fully present to what remains of our biosphere, and to love their family and friends; until they too share their last meal together, and accept their fate with grace and equanimity.#
- In the final moments of the movie, our heroes believe they have done everything possible to try and avert disaster- and indeed they have! The forces at work governing the human system of systems are vast, evolutionary, and beyond the ability of sapiens (the so called "wise ones") to effect the change some of them desire. The myths of progress, technology and economy are far too entrenched in the species at large. In rare moments when I dare to "hope" (which is admitting a lack of agency)- I believe the only chance for our species is a complete collapse of global industrial civilization- now! But frankly, I have come to believe that the momentum of Earth's Living Systems is such that even with a complete collapse, it will be extremely difficult for any Sapiens to survive.#
- One big difference between "Don't Look Up" and things as they actually are, is that mathematics can precisely pinpoint when a planet killing Comet will impact earth; whereas we do not have the computational capability to predict when Earth's Living Systems will tip out of the current stability regime that has been so favorable for human life. Perhaps that is a blessing- for none of us will know our precise future, only the general arc of our demise.#
- In conclusion, I remind myself to Live and Love my loved ones; and enjoy what is left of the grandeurs of our beautiful biosphere. I do not believe that a war with the external enemy can be won, because that enemy has already harnessed the forces of the biosphere for its own destruction and like all elites throughout human history, will do everthing possible to remain in power. Perhaps now, instead of chanting Don't Look Up- the only option available to us is to simply Look Inward?#
- PS- I hope to hell I am WRONG about this!#
- My grandfather used to say that- and on this New Years day I have something to share. At the ripe old age of 64, I have recorded my first song! Inspired by The Universe Story, it is named for Tiamat, the second generation star that was born over 10 billion years ago. Tiamat lived about 5 billion years and then exploded in a supernova that lit the universe for 7 days. She gave birth to everything in the Milky Way- so in a very real way, we truly are the stardust of Tiamat. #
- Tiamat#
- Every river and every star #
- Every person and every wave #
- Flaring Forth from Tiamat, the Story of all Time#
- Every Mother and Every Child#
- The good news it that like a majestic Steelhead caught and released, a song can continue to grow over time. I intend to refine this song as I dig deeper into music theory and practice the craft and my guitars. If you are curious to hear Taimat- drop me a line and I will send you the recording.#
- Happy New Year!#
- Very sad news today that Edward O. Wilson passed away Sunday, December 26th. at the age of 92. Although I enjoyed many books by him, my favorite by far was Consilience.
- Likewise, another call for Consilience comes from Christopher Alexander in his series on The Phenomena of Life. In this four volume set, he identifies a set of design principles that lead to the unfolding of human designed artifacts with the quality of Life- and demonstrates how these principles operate throughout all scales of our natural world.#
- In The Phenomena of Life, C. Alexander identifies 15 fundamental properties and expounds upon them over the course of 4 volumes! It is quite a tome that I am happy to have in my library and review from time to time. I have returned to the 15 properties recently as I embark upon new design thinking- both for my home/yard remodel, and for the music I am learning to create. In order to fully appreciate them, you need to read the book(s,) but I think creative types will recognize a degree of truth in the following Fifteen Fundamental Properties of Life (and Design):#
- 1) Levels of Scale#
- 2) Strong Centers#
- 3) Boundaries#
- 4) Alternating Repetition#
- 5) Positive Space#
- 6) Good Shape#
- 7) Local Symmetries#
- 8) Deep Interlock and Ambiguity#
- 9) Contrast#
- 10) Gradients#
- 11) Roughness#
- 12) Echoes#
- 13) The Void#
- 14) Simplicity and Inner Calm#
- 15) Not Separateness#
- I plan to return to these Principles in future writing as I continue digging deeper into design and music, science and humanity.#
- Mary Ann and I are on our annual holiday trip to the Dosewallip River and we have fresh steelhead on the menu! Yesterday was a good day- I got lucky, and managed to catch my limit right off the bat. It has been way too long since I last did so, but then it has been awhile since I worked hard at fishing for steelhead. The reason is simple- too many fisherman, and too few fish. I feel sorry for the fish- not the fisherman! Up in Washington State, most of the steelhead rivers are closed for fishing due to poor fish counts. As a consequence, my good friend Travis Reeves, his wife Maddy (5 months pregnant) and I hired a couple of young native guides to take us on the Quinalt Reservation on the west side of the Olympic Pinninusla. The tribe has a strong hatchery system and natives can make a little extra money guiding. I make it a general rule to not hire guides- but this was the exception to the rule that felt right, and I was happy to pay these two young native guides- and eat fresh Steelhead again. That makes for a very happy camper!#
- This holiday season, I have much to be thankful for- but the best present I have given to myself and my loved ones- is I finally quit drinking (and smoking pot!)#
- I cannot claim that it was all self discipline because I got pretty sick, surprisingly enough with Cannabinoid Hyperemesis Syndrome. But I knew I was drinking too much and it was the right time. What really did it for me was knowing how much it would extend the time left to spend with the girls in my life; Mary Ann, Roseanna and Shannon; and most especially my granddaughers Aubi and Aletheia! Aletheia is our youngest granddaughter born to Shannon and Mike, and living in Colorado. Aubi is our oldest granddaughter born to Roseanna and Skyler, and living only 8 miles away. Aubi is the 9 year old photographer that captured and edited these before and after pictures of me! Quite the change! HaHa :)#
- "It's a question of WON'T -POWER!"#
- Those are the words of my Grandpa and the real secret of how I managed to go cold turkey. From him I learned how to drink, and from him I learned how to quit. You just have to make up your mind. Grandpa Leo Beckwith was married to Lulu Boyd, and they are the source of most of my genes. From Leo, I acquired a love for the dark brown liquor of his Scottish homeland. He was an Ironworker and an Outdoorsman; he taught me the ways of hunting, fishing, and cussing! He was also a horser-whisperer and knew how to coddle a baby. Grandpa quit drinking in his mid 40's after a bar fight in Northern Idaho. It was the first fight he ever lost, and the last. I am so incredibly thankful to him for the time he spent with me- and now my main goal in life is to spend that kind of quality time with my granddaughters! Leo (and I) a long time ago with a Steelhead he took from the Snake River, in Hells Canyon, Idaho.#
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- "I have found two pieces of rare beauty. I am most grateful."#
- It was my job to mentor the young designers in sustainable design (daylighting in this case,) but it was they that taught me the power of Rhino! Having seen first hand how Rhino handles complex geometry in the hands of these youngsters, I took it upon myself to explore Grasshopper. #
- In one weekend, I surveyed the visual scripting environment, and the next weekend I tackled the design problem- spreading daylight from a large overhead aperatures in the roof of SFO Terminal 1- while minimizing glare and heat gain from the sun.#
- The results speak for themselves- and I was hooked! It is also somehow fitting that the solution looks a bit like a classic western hat! Too bad it was never built- but that's the thing about generative design- it's easy to design expensive solutions! Moving forward, I have some more practical design problems I will be pursuing, and having fun along the way!#
- Wow- it all works! #
- And it is Beautifull, Amazing, Wonderful, Extraordinary, Beautiful!#
- I am delighted with the ease of my transition to the Mac. Congratulations to Dave Winer (Scripting News) for Electric Drummer, and the team at Rhino/Grasshopper for their Mac implementation. And of course, congratualtions to Steve Jobs and Steve Wozniac for the legacy of design and engineering they left behind.#
- The Fun is just Beginning!#
- Way back in the early 80's I began using Apple computers on a Lisa, which was soon followed by an original 128K Mac! Unfortunately, professional CAD applications in those days required mainframes, then Unix machines and finally the PC. I was locked into the PC by various CAD applications for over three decades. Yuch! Now at last I have returned to my roots with a MacBook Pro which arrived yesterday. And of course the whole experience of unwrapping the packaging and setting it up has been a delight. Setting up email took a little doing, and it turns out my HP 11X17 LaserJet is a little too old- but I can live with that! Next step is to test SketchUp and Rhino on the new MacOS, and then I will move on to setting up my "KronoLog" using Drummer as a Mac App. After that, GarageBand, Grasshopper and back to design work. Retirement is "Beautiful, Amazing, Wonderful, Extraordinary, and Beautiful!"#