Good morning London, I'm Robert Elms.
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📻 Never has a radio introduction felt more reassuring. The morning after the night before and I couldn't handle the talk show bollocks. With perfect timing, Friday morning means the return of Robert Elms. Yer man opened with some Luther, then went straight into a Robert Gordon revivalist rockabilly track. Unique broadcasting, and all on the BBC as well.
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The Postman Delivers: The Stones' Sticky Fingers. I'm very, very, very late to this. I've never really got The Stones. I've always sat on The Beatles side of the fence. But some random listening earlier in the week led me towards Sticky Fingers and some of the lesser known tracks such as Can't You Hear Me Knocking. Three quid on CD? Go on then.
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🏏 I confess to something of a piss take when asked to take part in a Surrey cricket sponsorship survey. Marketing turns everything to shit, right? Sample question: which brands do you associate with Surrey? Answer: Fosters. Which sector would you like to sponsor Surrey? Trade Unions. Who would you like to sponsor Surrey? Extinction Rebellion. Given the club f-ed over the Members with the stupid Hundred, then ask as silly question, Comrades...
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⚫ I played Prince's Black album on vinyl mid-morning. I wasn't even sure if I still had this. I bought it off one of the engineers at Radio Trent in... 89? It was a MUST HAVE at the time. Now it just sounds a little ropey. This may be to do with the Dutch bootleg pressing. I've heard better quality AM radio broadcasts. I looked into buying a CD copy. Silly, silly prices.
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🚴 I managed an escape for a mid-afternoon swim. I cycled through campus. Some shitty advertising boards have gone up around one of the new developments. It looks like the University is building properties to sell or rent to non-students. The bullshit bingo declared "living on a global campus." There's the Essex Sports Arena for basketball, a half-decent rep theatre and, and...? The SU bar? Chin chin.
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🏊♂️ There's no such thing as a bad swim, but this wasn't one of the greatest. I wasn't really interested until 30 lengths in. I've put high expectations on my performance with the required sub-seventeen minute time. I was six seconds off this afternoon.
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I retired to the UKIP Racist Spa to sulk. I didn't last long.
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"We're in such a mess. I don't trust any of them. We need Boris back to sort everything out."
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I had to tip toe back to the changing rooms. There was a trail of toe jam from the pool to the gents. It was like an unhygienic Essex re-telling of Hansel and Gretel. It was also most repulsive.
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🌳 The Forest preview on BBC Nottingham was a little more optimistic. But it's the same every week: build up the expectations, only for a resounding kick in the bollocks when matchday actually comes around. Yes, I'll be there tomorrow lunchtime, soaking up the pre-match build up and believing all over again. Let's see how long it lasts.
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🐏 At least we're not D***y County. I had half an eye on the Sheep's away game up the road at Ipswich. Bahhh, in every sense.
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